


Amygdala

by PalenDrome (nerdherderette)



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - Hospital, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anal Fingering, Anal Play, Anal Sex, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Blow Jobs, Consensual Kink, Consensual Sex, Doctors & Physicians, Dream Sex, Dubious Ethics, F/M, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Light Bondage, M/M, Masturbation, Mildly Dubious Consent, Oral Sex, Redemption, Slow Burn, Star Wars AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-19
Updated: 2016-03-27
Packaged: 2018-05-21 14:13:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 41,567
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6054586
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nerdherderette/pseuds/PalenDrome
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rey Kenobi is a promising surgeon who has been assigned to spend the next two months training at Arkanis University Hospital.  Not only will she be without the support and companionship of her best friends Finn and Poe, but she has to contend with Dr. Snoke, the critical chair of neurosurgery; a jealous Dr. Bazine Netal; a devious Dr. Hux; and a tempestuous Dr. Kylo Ren.  SWTFA characters and references in  a Grey's Anatomy setting.  Slow burn and angst culminating in smut and fluff.<br/><br/><br/><br/>[excerpt]:<br/>"You're one to talk. I've seen the women you keep in your company," She spat out the words, laced with a hint of jealousy. "Isn't that what you like, Dr. Ren?"</p><p>She grew bolder, sliding her body towards him suggestively. "Isn't <em>this</em> what you want?"</p><p>His voice strangled in his throat. He pressed forward so his right leg straddled her hip, his arms encircling her face, a feral look in his eyes as he responded.</p><p>"Be careful what you ask for, Rey. You just might get it."</p><p> </p><p> </p>
            </blockquote>





	1. First Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Rey's first day at Arkanis University Hospital. Unfortunately, things don't go as smoothly as planned

 

Rey stood in front of the counter shaking the empty box, desperately willing a filter to drop from its walls. Great. 5:15 AM, first day of her new rotation, and no coffee. She wished for a brief moment that she had never declared their apartment a Keurig-free zone. She pointedly left the empty box by the coffee machine for her roommates and made a mental note to pick up some new filters on the way home. She loved Finn and Poe, but their mindset was definitely not on replenishing their limited household supplies. 

She threw a look at their bedroom door. Lucky guys. They had at least another hour to sleep.

There was no time to shower if she had to make a pit stop for coffee. Orientation for the new surgical residents was at 6:30, and rounds were at 7. She slipped into her jeans, tank top and favorite hoodie, throwing her hair into a messy bun in one fluid movement. She jammed her scrubs in her backpack with a bottled water and her cell. As she stepped out into the New York street, puddles from last night’s rain reflected the street lights and the smell of petrichor mixed with city pavement. Normally she would settle her headphones in place, but something about the quiet and solitude of this morning appealed to her and she let them sit in her pocket.

She rounded the corner to the #6 and thought about the long ride midtown. For the last two months, she had worked at Republic Inner City Hospital. Visible from her apartment, RIH was a large public hospital, catering to a diverse population including the indigent and uninsured. Although they were supervised by attending physicians, patient care was as resident driven as it could be for this stage of their training. Rey loved Republic's frenetic energy, it's ability to provide great care despite a shoestring budget and an overworked staff. It also happened to be the place where both Finn and Poe were doing their internal medicine residency.

For the next two months however, she would be training at Arkanis University Hospital. A private hospital, Arkanis was sleek, modern, and had a constant influx of money to keep it at the forefront of research and technology. It was not unusual to see celebrities and diplomats from all over the world step through Arkanis’ doors. Here, everything was attending physician driven and hierarchical. In short, it was everything that Rey was not. 

Lost in her thoughts, twenty minutes elapsed in the space of a second, the subway map flashing as a pleasant electronic voice announced her stop overhead. She made her way to the sliding doors, which were quickly being filled with the rush of morning commuters. As she ascended the station steps to street level, the bright morning light illuminated her face and hit her with its warmth. The streets were now loud with cars and the humming of activity. Rey looked down at her phone. She was three blocks from the hospital, and it was only 6:10, definitely enough time for a caffeine infusion. She spied a vendor on the corner, and the line which snaked in front of him implied that the coffee would be good. 

“Large coffee, one sugar and a little milk. And a plain bagel, please.”

Rey handed him her change, pulled the tab of the white cover back, inhaled and took a sip. Perfect. She felt the liquid warm the back of her throat and settle in her stomach. With the sun out and some caffeine percolating through her system, she started to feel fortified. Although it was a different setting from that which she was accustomed to, she would be training with some of the world’s most preeminent physicians at Arkanis. She would have the chance to meet new mentors, perhaps make some new friends, and if they all ended up being pretentious stick-in-the-muds, then at least she could take solace in griping to Finn and Poe about her experience. She knew that many in her position would give their right arms to gain such an opportunity.

Around the corner, she saw the hospital, its windowed and sleek profile standing out even in a Manhattan skyline of sleek, windowed buildings. She frowned as she glanced at her phone. 6:20 AM. The pedestrian “walk” sign started flashing yellow, but she had time to cross. As she began to make her way into the crosswalk, she heard a loud rumble which reverberated through her belly, cutting through the normal city din. Looking around, she saw the front of a sleek, black motorcycle, rounding the corner dangerously close to the curb. It was low lying, chromed out, and powerfully massive. Her affront at not being given the right of way turned to something more when there was a backsplash from the puddle which had settled in between the street and the curb, painting her jeans and splattering into her open coffee cup. 

She turned her head to vent her frustration and anger at the driver, only to see the back of a large figure dressed in black, stretched out over the bike. His broad shoulders were squared and powerful, and his gloves barely hid the strength in his hands as he controlled the bike's trembling energy through a maze of cabs and pedestrians. A black helmet hid his face from her view and obliterated any distinguishing features aside from his hair, ebony waves peeking out and caressing the underside of its fiberglass shield. He seemed as angry and raw as the bike that he rode, and Rey decided to keep quiet and berate him mentally instead.

She sighed, and waited for the sign to turn green again. Throwing the remainder of her coffee into the nearest trash can, she crossed the threshold to the hospital.


	2. Rounds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey meets Phasma and the rest of the surgical residents. She finally learns the name of the man who's been plaguing her since the morning.
> 
> [excerpt]:  
> She let out an audible gasp. It was quiet enough that Phasma and James, who stood next to her, didn't turn their heads to inquire, but loud enough for the man to bring his eyes to her face and catch her stare.
> 
> Rey reddened furiously and looked away from his intense gaze and down towards his shoes.
> 
> Not shoes. _Motorcycle boots._
> 
> Snoke gestured, not without a bit of pride. "And this, ladies and gentlemen, is Dr. Kylo Ren."

The multi-storied entrance was huge and well-lit and shuttered out the traffic from the avenue as the sensored doors whooshed closed behind her. Priceless art adorned the muted walls, breathing color into the hushed tones of the lobby. Rey winced as her wet sneakers squeaked against the marbled floor, protesting loudly with each step as she finally reached the information desk. Rey didn’t miss the quick glance the receptionist threw at her coffee-stained clothes before it was quickly replaced by a smile which didn’t quite reach her eyes.

“May I help you?” Lips pressed into a smile, not a hair out of place.

“Yes, please.” Rey fumbled for her ID. “I’m looking for the surgical suite.”

“Building A, 2nd floor. Take the first set of elevators and make a right.” Still smiling, blue eyes still judging.

“Thanks.” Rey stuffed her ID back in her backpack and headed towards the elevator. The doors opened, and she took a quick breath as she rode up to the second floor. The wooden panels were interspersed with brass columns spit polished to reflect her disheveled appearance. She quickly tucked in her hair and wiped the sweat from her brow as the elevator doors re-opened.

A large sign announcing "The Department of Surgery” was emblazoned on the wall. As she headed down the corridor, she saw the well-lit door of the surgical suite and the sound of excited male and female voices. She approached the front desk, where a slight woman sat with oversized glasses and deceptively unassuming demeanor.

“Hi, you must be Rey.” Her wizened face looked up expectantly and knowingly.

Rey took out her ID for confirmation. “Yes, how did you know?”

The woman chuckled. “You’re the last one to sign in. Seventh out of our seven new residents for this rotation.”

Rey blushed and took a quick peek at the clock on the wall. 6:29 AM.

If the older woman felt her discomfort, she made no note of it. “I’m Maz, the office manager. I’ll be taking care of your processing.” She handed Rey a hospital-issued cell phone as well as a booklet. “We replaced all our old beeper systems with these cells last year. You’ll be required to return it at the end of the rotation, and there will be a penalty for loss or damages. This booklet contains your meal credits for the week. You can come back every Monday for a new one." Her face broke out into a grin as she patted Rey's hand. "Don’t lose it, it’s probably the hottest commodity around here!”

Rey smiled. She was knew all too well how financial constraints could limit one's gastronomical options.

Maz pushed a stapled packet towards her. “Here’s a list of contact information for the department and a link to our policies and procedures for you to review. I need you to sign here, stating that you received the materials, and then you can take a seat with the rest of the group.”

Maz's eyes were warm, but Rey felt as if those eyes could assess all her past insecurities and future potential in one glance. She scrawled her name and hurriedly joined the group seated on the couches in the waiting area. There was an empty seat next to a statuesque blonde, and as Rey looked questioningly in her direction, the woman lifted her eyes, smiled and patted the seat next to her.

Rey smiled back gratefully.

"Hi. I'm Rey." She stuck out her hand by means of an introduction.

The other woman shook Rey's hand in a firm, but friendly grip. "Hey, Rey, I'm Phasma. Actually, it's Gwen Phasma, but all my friends call me 'Phasma.'"

“Phasma it is then."

Phasma had an Amazonian bearing, grey-blue eyes which brokered no nonsense, and hair just long enough to tuck over her right ear and out of her face. It wasn't just her carriage that demanded an immediate respect, there was something else about her that Rey couldn't quite place, something familiar.

Phasma caught Rey staring and laughed as she made a mock-bow. "Yup, you got me. Viral sensation Gwen Phasma, at your service. My greatest moment of shame played out over every social media platform for everyone's enjoyment."

Suddenly, Rey remembered. Gwendoline Phasma was a former Olympic volleyball star turned MMA fighter. She was accosted by three drunken louts who, when their amorous advances were rebuffed, decided their collective testosterone levels could inflict some serious damage on a potential world champ. Phasma had attempted to deflect their unwanted attentions in an effort to avoid collateral damage at the crowded club by exiting through the back door. The confrontation, however, was over almost as soon as it had started. Phasma misjudged a step, slamming her right side against a vertical trash compactor, twisting her left knee unnaturally in the process. She was down without even throwing a punch, and the paparazzi and media caught every second of her inglorious fall.

Rey wanted to mutter something sympathetically, but held back. She was sure that Phasma did not welcome that type of attention.

Phasma shrugged. "I ended up tearing nearly every ligament in my knee, and some cartilage too. After I went through reconstructive surgery, I decided that instead of breaking them, I'd fix limbs for a living. So as cliche'd as it is for a former athlete to say, if all goes as planned, I'll be an orthopod in five years."

"It's not cliche'd, Phasma," Rey replied honestly. "I envy your commitment and how well you know yourself." 

The room hushed as an older gentleman entered the room. He was dressed in a tailored suit which bespoke of power and class.

“Good morning. I’m Dr. Stanley, and I’ll be your preceptor for this rotation. As you know, Arkanis chooses a select few from many highly qualified individuals all over the world to train in our residency program. We aim to provide you with a customized and individualized academic experience, and in return expect you to become future leaders in the surgical field." 

He lowered his glasses and looked pointedly across seven expectant faces. "As first years, you will focus on developing your foundational skills in general surgery and in the management of the critically injured. However, you will also have the opportunity to learn from the other surgical subspecialties here as well. Your group in particular is extremely fortunate, as Dr. Snoke and his two neurosurgical fellows are currently doing research with the NIH, so there will be opportunities for both clinical and research experience during your time here with us.”

An excited murmur went through the room. Dr. Snoke was the leading expert in the field of traumatic brain injury, as well as the effects of injury on memory and behavior. He was also famous for downplaying recent relaxations on residency training hours and for his strict disciplinarian stance. He was the most storied and influential physician currently practicing in Arkanis.

“You’ll have direct oversight from the senior and chief surgical residents, with plenty of opportunities to interact with the fellows and attendings within the Department of Surgery. Service rounds are held at 7 AM daily, and there will be conferences throughout the week as well as weekly surgical Grand Rounds. As a first year surgical resident, your call responsibilities average every fifth night, under the supervision of a senior resident."

Dr. Stanley looked at the clock. “Maz will show you to your lockers, where you can get changed into scrubs. Doctors Unamo, Giacchino and Godrich, you’ll head to the surgical unit on 2 North and meet with Dr. Kolonia for rounds. Doctors Phasma, Thanisson, Craig and Kenobi, you will head to the Surgical ICU with me. See you in ten.”

The residents filed out, some of them high fiving each other, amped up. Rey quickly changed into her scrubs, briefly noticing that her worn sneakers contrasted starkly with the brightly colored custom Nike and Adidas gear peeking out from underneath her colleagues' pants. She filed out of the locker room with Phasma, Thomas and James as quick introductions were made. When they reached the ICU, one of the senior residents was waiting with Dr. Stanley. Rey saw the raised eyebrows and knowing looks that her two male counterparts gave each other upon seeing Dr. Netal.

Bazine Netal had strong, expressive brows framing a heart shaped face and calculating eyes. Her lips were a deep red, and she had sleek, raven hair which cascaded below her shoulders. Her scrubs did little to hide the swell of her breasts and the curve of her hips. Although her body had a come-hither quality, her face projected an icy and shrewd demeanor that would likely give most men pause.

Rey got the feeling that Dr. Netal did not have many friends, and that none of them carried an XX chromosomal pairing.

Phasma picked up on Netal's vibe. "I'm guessing we're going to have to watch our backs with that one," she whispered conspiratorially.

Dr. Stanley spoke. "We have a twelve bed Surgical ICU, with beds nine through twelve slotted for Neurosurgical ICU patients. We're currently running a full census. Dr. Netal, please distribute the patient list and give a summary of each case as we round."

He stopped suddenly. "Ahhh, Dr. Snoke!"

The group was herded towards the other end of the ICU, where Dr. Snoke stood outside a patient's closed door. Despite his towering accomplishments, Snoke was physically much smaller than Rey would have imagined. He appeared emaciated and kyphotic, as if his spindly legs would collapse with the slightest provocation.

Snoke turned away from the much taller male he was conversing with and faced Dr. Stanley, giving him a curt nod. The other male was handsome, although his bearing hinted at an arrogance and inflexibility. His reddish hair was combed through and slicked back, and his eyebrows and sideburns neatly trimmed. He looked polished and put together, despite the early morning hour. There was no questioning his authority and rank as he inclined his head briefly to acknowledge the incoming residents. Rey noticed that Netal's gaze lingered a little too long on his face.

"So there are our new recruits? Welcome." Snoke's voice didn't need volume to command the attention of the room, and there was an undercurrent of mild disdain in his words. "I look forward to watching these young physicians develop their abilities and expertise." 

He gestured to the taller man at his side. "This is Dr. Hux, who has been involved in developing our deep brain stimulation program here at Arkanis."

The door behind him opened suddenly with a barely contained energy as an imposing figure exited the patient's room. "The ICP monitoring system is in place, Sir," he reported to Snoke, his masculine voice reverberating deeply. 

Although only several inches taller than Dr. Hux, his movements and posture gave the impression of someone much larger. His face was a mix of contradictions: its angular planes stood out starkly against the soft waves of his hair; his ebony mane contrasted against the paleness of his skin; the strength of his aquiline nose juxtaposed against the fullness of his lips. His long muscular arms were anchored by large, powerful hands, hands which looked like they could control and contain almost anything in their grasp.

Rey had seen those hands before.

She let out an audible gasp. It was quiet enough that Phasma and James, who stood next to her, didn't turn their heads to inquire, but loud enough for the man to bring his eyes to her face and catch her stare.

Rey reddened furiously and looked away from his intense gaze and down towards his shoes.

Not shoes. _Motorcycle boots._

Snoke gestured, not without a bit of pride. "And this, ladies and gentlemen, is Dr. Kylo Ren."


	3. Scrubbing In

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The diversion of trauma patients from nearby Coruscant General forces Rey to scrub in with Ren, where she makes a professional and personal connection.  
> *mildly explicit scene at the very end 
> 
> [excerpt]:  
> Rey locked the door behind him and turned off the lights. It was 1 AM, but she was overly tired, and unable to sleep. She was too aware of the starched sheets which were suddenly too warm and weighed too heavily on her and she flipped over onto her belly. Immediately she became flooded with sensations and memories of HIM...Ren's scent, his presence, the heat from where he had sat just several hours before.

Finn dropped the bag of Chinese take out on top of the table, the pliable folds of plastic peeling back to expose the intricately folded cardboard containers inside. Rey inhaled deeply, trying to alleviate her hunger pains with the intoxicating mix of sauces, meats and grease. She was excited to eat, but mostly to see her friends. This was the first time in 3 days that she, Finn and Poe were home together on the same night.

Well, at least she and Finn were. Poe was still stuck at work.

She tried to sit patiently as her stomach growled in protest. Finn laughed. “It’s ok,” he said, grinning broadly, “You can start, you know. That sounded a little scary.” He pointed in the direction of the offending noise.

Rey wanted to, but held back. “What about Poe?”

Finn looked down at his text messages. “He said he was finishing up with his last patient and that he’d be here any minute. Look, I’m starving too. I’ll join you.” To prove his point, he opened the bag and popped a steaming dumpling into his mouth, with Rey soon following suit. “If he’s not here in five, I’ll call to see where he is.”

“No need.” Poe’s voice breezed through the doorway. “Nice to see you guys starting without me. Now I know where your loyalties lie,” he accused Finn mockingly.

“Sorry, not sorry,” Rey shot back, deliberately taking a forkful of noodles and shoving them in her mouth, savoring the sweetness tinged with spice.

“Hey, Rey,” Poe planted a kiss on her forehead before heading over to sit next to Finn. He tilted Finn’s head back lovingly and placed a gentle kiss on his mouth.

“Missed you today,” he murmured. “Sorry we couldn’t meet up earlier. I had a patient who crashed and was down in the cath lab all morning.” Poe deepened his kiss slightly, his tongue pressing against the warmth and insistency of Finn’s.

Rey looked at her best friends, with a mixture of longing and envy. She wondered if she would ever find someone who would look at her in that way, so fully and unconditionally.

“Ahem, guys, still here?”

Poe broke off the kiss. “Sorry Rey, only did that because Finn’s hogging all the food and I had to get his attention somehow.” He brushed the corner of Finn’s lower lip and winked, while Finn had the decency to look half guilty as he punched Poe good-naturedly in the arm.

“I miss you guys. I miss …this,” Rey swept her arm around the room as if she could encompass Finn, Poe, their apartment, and the dwindling rays of the September sunset in one gestalt. “Are you guys working this weekend? I’d love to go out and blow off some steam. Any takers?”

“Sounds great, Rey. I’m in,” said Poe as Finn nodded too. “How’s everything going at Arkanis by the way?”

“Ok, I guess. I haven’t scrubbed in on any cases yet but I’m sort of the go-to person for bedside procedures and stuff on the unit.” Rey was being modest. She was always on top of her cases clinically, and her dexterity and procedural skills were not lost on Dr. Stanley or her peers.

“Of course you are,” Poe said, rolling his eyes. “That’s a given. What I meant was, how’s it going with all those…” Poe and Finn finished the sentence by tilting their noses up in the air and peering down haughtily in an imitation of upper crust society worthy of Monty Python.

Rey laughed. “Actually, the other residents in my year have been pretty great. Not as great as you guys, of course” she added quickly, noticing the faux-hurt looks on their faces. “The attendings are a little stand-offish, but I expected that.”

“No hotties? Not one?” asked Finn.

“Nope, none,” she replied a little too quickly as an image of Ren infiltrated her thoughts.

The next morning, Rey packed her backpack with an extra-large thermos filled with coffee, her toothbrush, and a spare change of clothes. She was scheduled for her first overnight call tonight, but if all went well, she would be able to head home tomorrow after Grand Rounds, giving her time to nap before going out with Finn and Poe. Unfortunately, she had to survive call with Bazine, but she took comfort in the fact that Thomas and their chief resident Simon would be there as well.

Dr. Stanley had allowed Rey to take over reporting responsibilities during rounds that morning while Bazine was scrubbed in on a burn case that was transferred from Coruscant General. A conflict had broken out between two rival gangs, resulting in multiple people injured, many seriously, which Coruscant was not able to handle. These patients were being diverted to Arkanis. Dr Stanley had requested that all but the most critically ill ICU patients be transferred to the floor, leaving the intensive care rooms available if needed. By mid-afternoon, nearly all of Arkanis' operating rooms were going full throttle.

Phasma, Rey, and Simon were the only ones remaining to manage the ICU when Dr. Stanley called in. Simon picked up, conversed briefly, then returned to Phasma and Rey.

"This should be the last case they're sending over because we're full and will be off diversion, but it's a big one. A kid, 25, gunshot wound to head, GCS of 4. Penetrating injury, left temporal entrance wound. Pupils dilated, non-reactive. Intracranial hematoma on Head CT. No cervical or spinal injury. Hux and Ren are evaluating the patient and the CAT scans now. " He sighed apologetically. "They’re most likely going to do a clot evacuation, and need an additional hand in the OR. I can’t go because I have to supervise on the unit. We’re short with all these new cases. I’m sorry guys, one of you will have to go in.”

Rey looked at Phasma, who looked like she was running on fumes. “Phasma, I'll go. You’re post call, I have to be here overnight anyway.”

Phasma looked at Rey gratefully. “Thanks, I owe you one. I’ll hold down the fort here with Simon.”

Rey headed towards the OR, scrubbed and gowned up. She nodded to the anesthesiologist and took her place next to the OR table where Ren was positioning the head with Mayfield pins. Rey noticed that the nurses and technicians were looking at each other nervously as Hux and Ren bickered under their breaths, the room filling with their angry energy, heated further by the overhead lights.

Hux's steely blue eyes looked accusingly at Ren, his lips pursed under his mask. "I don't know why you feel this was warranted. This patient's level of consciousness and near lack of brainstem function almost guarantees that this is an expensive exercise in futility. You'd be better off spending your 'talents' elsewhere, perhaps somewhere less ineffective."

Ren glared, barely containing his anger as he gritted out the words. "This patient survived the transfer over to us. He has a clot that can be evacuated to relieve pressure, while your 'treatment' does nothing but virtually guarantee him a certain death. We've already discussed this with Snoke. You are to defer the medical decision making to me on this case."

The technician brought over the operating microscope as Ren opened the field and dissected down to the clot. "Retractors," he demanded.

Hux looked over and spied Rey. "Dr. Kenobi, is it?" he asked. "So very nice of you to assist us. I'm glad that your seniors thought so much of this case that they sent a first year to help our esteemed Dr. Ren."

Rey bit back an inappropriate retort that nearly sprang from her lips. "As I'm sure you are aware, Dr. Hux, all these new cases from Coruscant have strained our available staff. Although I am but a first year, I can assure you that I am skilled, hardworking, and will assist in any way that I can. I am honored to have been asked to scrub in on this case."

Ren, still looking through the microscope, could almost be seen reveling in Hux's embarassment at being upbraided in front of the OR staff. Hux's eyes narrowed. Rey took the retractor handle and held it for Ren.

Rey watched in fascination as Ren's hands, so massive and powerful, delicately removed fragments of shattered bone and necrotic brain tissue over the next several hours. After the clot was successfully removed, he cauterized the few visible bleeding vessels and looked up at Hux.

" I believe that we are almost ready to close here, Hux. I am sure that Dr. Kenobi can assist me with the remainder of the case."

"As you wish. Please don't forget to dictate the operating report when you are finished, I believe you have quite a number of those pending." With that parting shot, Hux quickly turned on his heel and exited the room.

"Dr. Kenobi, why don't you take a look before we close," Ren asked, stepping away from the microscope. "That's his temporal lobe. Do you know it's function?"

Rey thought back to medical school and wished she had paid more attention in neuroanatomy class. "Isn't it involved in language?"

"Yes," said Ren, "But it's much more than that. The temporal lobe connects to other areas of our brain. It plays a role in our memories, our ability to recognize things, our emotions. There's a great chance that these things will be affected in our patient, even if he's able to pull through."

Rey helped to close, then washed up and stretched as she exited the sterile area. She was exhausted and hungry. She looked down at her cell. Damn. 8:30 PM. The cafeteria was closed. The fatigue of the day under the heat of the OR lights hit her at once, making her lightheaded, causing her to lose her balance slightly. A pair of masculine hands reached out from behind to steady her. She leaned backwards instinctively and found herself buttressed by the broadness of his chest.

"Are you feeling alright, Dr. Kenobi?" His words mixed softly against the weight of her hair as Ren turned Rey around, his brown eyes studying her pale face intently.

"Yes, sorry...I guess it's from all the excitement of the day. I kind of forgot to each lunch as well…" Rey's voice trailed.

Ren frowned. "I just ordered a lot of food, much more than I can eat. Head on over the residents' lounge, I'll be by in a bit."

Rey was too tired to protest as she punched in the keypad code and entered the call quarters. All the call room doors were wide open. Simon, Bazine and Thomas must still be busy with their cases. Rey headed towards the closest room, throwing her backpack on the desk and flopping onto the bed. She must have dozed off for a minute, as she was awoken by a knock.

Ren's figure filled the doorway, as he held a bag from the corner deli. "Sustenance," he said, sitting down next to her. The bed shifted underneath his weight, as he placed a variety of foods on a makeshift table in front of them. "What's your pleasure, Dr. Kenobi?"

Rey flushed slightly at the question. Ren had changed into a pair of tightly fitting jeans which hugged his powerful long legs. The top two buttons of his shirt were left unbuttoned, the remaining fabric stretching across his chest and upper arms, reminding her of his strength when she had leaned against him. His hair, hidden for hours under a surgical cap, now tumbled out in dark waves which framed his face, which had also begun to show traces of stubble. He personified virility, with a hint of danger. Rey became acutely aware of his tall frame sitting so close to her, his thigh lingering against hers with the briefest of touches, heat emanating from their proximity.

"Please, call me 'Rey.' And I'll take the turkey club, if that's alright with you." Rey was still dizzy, but she was no longer sure if it was solely due to hunger. She fought to keep her hands at her sides, longing to reach out and feel the roughness of his stubble under her fingers.

"The Reuben's got my name all over it, and the club is yours." He handed the sandwich to Rey, fingers accidentally brushing against hers as he did.

The turkey suddenly felt dry in her mouth.

He continued. "You were really fantastic in there. I'm impressed with your instrument handling and suturing techniques. Most first years don’t show that level of aptitude, even for practical procedures.”

Rey couldn’t help feeling a little swell of pride. “I gained a lot of experience the last two months when I was at Republic. They give the residents there a lot more leeway in terms of direct patient care compared to Arkanis. Plus I’ve always loved working with my hands, even as a child.” Rey looked slightly wistful. “I really appreciate you letting me assist you, Dr. Ren. I know it doesn’t happen a lot here. It’s an amazing thing, to be able to make such a difference in someone’s life.” She thought back to the patient. “Will he eventually need a cranioplasty?”

Ren nodded. “Yes, but we have time. We have to make sure that the swelling goes down first and that there are no signs of infection, which is a huge risk with these open injuries.” He took a drink and looked at her appraisingly.

“Rey, I’m working with Dr. Snoke on a number of different projects for the NIH. You should consider coming on board. We would make a great team."

Rey’s eyes widened, brown flecked with green and gold, and Ren looked into them a little too long as she felt a warmth creep into her face.

“That would be amazing. I’ll think about it seriously, Dr. Ren.”

Ren laughed, his smile lighting up his face and softening its angular planes. “Rey, I’m only several years older than you. If we’re going to work together in the future, you’ll have to call me ‘Kylo.’ You’re going to make me feel like I’m Snoke’s age if you keep calling me ‘Dr. Ren.’”

He placed a hand on her shoulder, perhaps as a friendly gesture, but it burned underneath his touch. A palpable undercurrent of electricity flew back and forth between them and his eyes swiftly took on a look of desire. He brushed the back of his fingers along the sensitive part of her neck, amplifying their connection, and Rey suddenly felt suffocated, her heart racing, lips slightly parting. She wasn’t sure if it was wishful thinking, but his lips seemed to draw closer, the distance between their visages diminishing.

The electronic sounds of the keypad interrupted them as the main door opened and Thomas and Bazine entered. Rey missed the triumphant gaze in Bazine's eyes as Kylo quickly removed his hand from Rey and shifted slightly to his right. He nodded to the two of them as he stood. "I should be going, I have a number of reports to dictate before I head home. Please help yourself to the rest of the food, there's lots of it."

And with that, he was gone.

Bazine sniffed. "I'm just here to pick up some things, I have another issue to attend to before turning in." She looked at Rey with a hint of jealousy, grabbing her satchel before exiting the room. "No need to save any for me, I've already eaten."

Thomas sat down next to Rey, grabbing a handful of fries.

"So, any progress with Bazine?" Rey inquired, remembering how he had eyed her earlier that week.

"Nah, I'm over that."

Rey looked at him inquisitively.

"My brother graduated from this program a couple years ago and gave me the low down. Turns out Bazine and Hux had a thing on and off. But Hux apparently has an 'on and off thing' with lots of people, and I'm not about to chase after his leftovers."

Rey digested that piece of information as Thomas took a swig of vitamin-infused water. She decided to ask him another question.

"I was in on a case with Hux and Ren today and they were at each other's throats non-stop. Any backstory?"

Thomas nodded knowingly, unsurprised. "Ren is Snoke's pet project. Has been for years. He did some crazy brilliant research in high school that got the attention of the national media and Snoke. Ren's parents are some hippie doctors working with Doctors without Borders. From what I hear, they were hoping that Ren would join them after he finished his training, but Snoke believes he's the future of Arkanis and has been grooming him for that ever since.

"Hux is also brilliant, but in a different way. Grade smart, AOA, always top of his class. He loves everything finessed and believes technology is the future of medicine, which is why he's into things like deep brain stimulation and robot-assisted clot evacuations. I'm guessing that he sees Ren as a wunderkind whose success has been handed to him, while he's had to work for every one of his. Anyway, they're both too egotistical and too busy competing for Snoke's attention to compromise."

Thomas finished the remaining fries and stood up. "Thanks Rey, for sharing. I'm going to try to get some shut eye."

Rey locked the door behind him and turned off the lights. It was 1 AM, but she was overly tired, and unable to sleep. She was too aware of the starched sheets which were suddenly too warm and weighed too heavily on her and she flipped over onto her belly. Immediately she became flooded with sensations and memories of _him_...Ren's scent, his presence, the heat from where he had sat just several hours before. She thought of the touch of his hand on her shoulder and the hardness of his chest when she had leaned against him, and she felt a stirring in her abdomen along with a growing heat and wetness between her legs. Her heartbeat grew faster, and she felt a flush of shame as she brought her hand lower, not stopping even when she heard the main door open and Simon head towards his room.

She slipped her underwear down, already wet with her need, feeling the mild restraint of the cloth on her wrist as she applied pressure to her swollen mons. Rey imagined Ren's lips on hers as she gently traced her finger tips in a circular pattern, feeling her juices slick against her fingers. She slowly pressed her other hand against the muscles of her stomach, dragging it slowly up her side to her breast, finding and rolling her nipple between her fingers, feeling it peak to the touch. She imagined Ren above her, gathering her breast in his mouth, sucking, flicking until her nipple pebbled against his tongue. She rapidly applied more pressure with her hands, feeling his weight on her, willing his image downwards, visualizing him tonguing the swell of her hips, licking and nipping gently as his face came to rest between her thighs, his stubble creating friction against her most tender of regions, the hardness of his erection pressing against her leg.

She was moving faster now, panting, her fingers a surrogate for Ren's tongue, pressing and swirling, laving over lips moistened and shiny with her desire for him as he inhaled her scent deeply. She hesitantly stuck one, then two fingers inside of her, delving deeper, her damp walls tightening around them. She pressed down into the bed, using her free hand to grab her thigh, imagining him holding onto her hips, gently restraining her while staring at her with lust filled eyes, his wicked smile, his filthy mouth swollen and reddened with her juices, daring her to come and she jutted her hips upwards and curled her toes under as the contractions came with the release she desperately craved, crying out " _Kylo, Kylo, Kylo_."


	4. Information

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bazine Netal brings Hux some information which could provide very useful against Ren. He rewards her diligence the best way he knows how.  
> *Explicit, consensual sex with kink.
> 
>    
> [excerpt]:  
> "But of course," Hux replied, lips pressed into a thin smile. "Whatever can I help you with at this hour?"
> 
> Bazine took a seat across from Hux at his desk. She crossed her legs, slowly and deliberately, angling her body so the swell of her breasts were visible, a suggestion of black lace under the _V_ of her scrub top. She brought her eyes up to his. "I believe I have some information that may be of great interest to you."

Bazine approached the door of Hux's office, the light streaming from underneath and the audible clicking of the keyboard letting her know that he was still up, working. He was likely poring over patient charts and the OR schedule for tomorrow, she thought. She knew that he would not welcome a visitor at this hour, however her information could not wait. She knocked, holding her breath slightly in anticipation of his response.

She heard a chair push back and clipped steps approaching. Hux opened the door, displeasure clearly etched on his face at the intrusion.

"Dr. Netal," he said, looking down with cool eyes and a dispassionate gaze.

Bazine licked her lips slowly, the pink tip of her tongue darting against the redness and fullness of her lips. "Hux. May I come in?" She stepped forward, pressing her body close to the entrance of the doorway so he had no recourse but to take a step back.

"But of course," Hux replied, lips pressed into a thin smile. "Whatever can I help you with at this hour?"

Bazine took a seat across from Hux at his desk. She crossed her legs, slowly and deliberately, angling her body so the swell of her breasts were visible, a suggestion of black lace under the _V_ of her scrub top. She brought her eyes up to his. "I believe I have some information that may be of great interest to you."

Hux kept his gaze neutral, although his pulse skipped a beat at her news. He walked over to the corner of his desk, leaning yet maintaining his authoratative stance over the younger woman. "Don't toy with me, Bazine," he said impatiently, "What is it?"

"Well," she said, relishing the hold she had over him, however briefly. "I believe that I may have caught Dr. Ren in a somewhat...compromising position." She savored the interest on his face as the words left her mouth.

Hux tilted his head, urging her to continue.

"You can imagine my surprise," Bazine said "When I entered the call room and saw him there. Alone, with her." She spat out the word 'her' as Hux raised an eyebrow in question. "Dr. Kenobi. His hands on her shoulder, touching her face. So very...inappropriately."

"Jealous, Bazine? "Hux hissed dangerously. "It doesn't flatter you."

Bazine ignored the jibe. "And the best part is, I have a witness. Thomas Thanisson was with me and saw them as well."

Hux breathed in sharply, as his lips turned up into a vicious smile. "Interesting. It appears that Dr. Ren not only has issues with his control in the operating room but also with consorting inappropriately with those under his supervision. Whatever are we to do?" He drummed his fingers against the edge of the desk wickedly.

Bazine looked up, tracing the muscles of Hux's inner thigh. "You wouldn't know anything about 'consorting inappropriately,' would you Hux?"

Hux angrily shoved her hand away from him. "It's not the same, Bazine. Ren has been on probation numerous times. Throwing temper tantrums in the operating room, destroying equipment, threatening staff who dare to contradict him? SO childish, so uncontrolled and so unprofessional. But Snoke continues to protect him, putting him out there as the face of our department, as Arkanis' spokesman in all those press conferences."

He continued, with barely repressed rage and jealousy. "My patient outcomes are as great as his, my methods more refined, and I have the respect of my peers." He was spitting out the words. "But even with all my accolades, Snoke continues to favor Ren's methods over mine. " Hux stood slowly and brought his face towards Bazine, icy blue eyes fervent and calculating. "Now, I wonder. How would Arkanis' esteemed medical board feel about a potential future neurosurgical chair embroiled in such a titillating scandal? A poor, lowly intern forced to contend with the sexual appetites of her supervising physician?"

Bazine felt the heat of Hux's words and his breath on her lips as he brushed his knuckles against the angle of her jaw. The threat and danger underlying them both brought a frisson of excitement which jolted through her, and she parted her legs subconsciously as the dampness began to seep in between them.

"You did very well, my dear." And with that, Hux brought his face down to hers and ground his lips against her possessively.

He bruised her lips, lowering his head and grazing his teeth against the soft paleness of skin protecting the pulse point in her neck. Bazine let out a soft moan, and Hux felt himself getting hard, the tightness and friction of his clothing against his arousal increasing his excitement and need for her.

Bazine brought her hands forward to cup him and struggled to lower his zipper as Hux slapped her hands away. "Tsk, tsk," he admonished her. "Who gave you permission to act on your own? You should know better than that."

Bazine dropped her hands to her sides, the excitement and pleasure coursing through her legs and belly amplified by her inability to acknowledge it with her touch.

"Take off your shirt. Slowly," Hux breathed. She slowly lifted her top overhead, Hux's gaze taking in the femininity of her curves, the flatness of her belly, the contour of her ribs, and the fullness of her breasts barely contained in demicups of lace. Her nipples peaked and hardened under the coolness of the air and Hux's stare. She looked questioningly at the door, closed but unlocked.

Hux took her head in his hands and firmly turned her towards him. "Leave it," he threatened. "Did I say you could look away?"

Bazine stood, experiencing a strange mixture of embarassment along with desire and a heady sense of power as she watched Hux gazing at her, his trousers tented by his hardened cock, breathing slightly hitched.

"Your pants," Hux ordered quietly, and she loosened the drawstring, feeling the blue fabric glide over her hips and puddle around her ankles. She lifted her long, shapely legs slowly, stepping forward once before Hux stopped her with his stare.

She remained standing, matching black lace panties doing nothing to hide her shaved pussy. The moisture which had gathered around the edges of the lace dampened the material, outlining her labia in all its fullness. Hux moved closer, unclasping her bra between his thumb and forefinger in one deft movement, before hooking his thumb around the string of her underwear and yanking downwards. He stepped back for a second, a feral look in his eyes as she stood motionless, her skin taking on a pinkish tinge, bared completely for him to see.

Her skin felt on fire, hypersensitive in its shame and want. She bit her lower lip, drawing a small amount of blood, oozing and contrasting against the whiteness and hardness of her teeth and the split in the delicate pink skin. Hux's breathing became ragged as he bridged the gap between them in two long strides, taking her silky hair in his grip and twisting it to draw her head back, bringing her to her knees

"You are such a filthy whore," he said. "Are you thinking about Ren? You think he can make you feel this way?" Hux grabbed the restraints sitting in his bottom desk drawer, wrapping the soft foam coverings around her wrists and snapping the plastic buckles in place. He brought her arms around her back and bound them together with the straps, bending her forwards over his desk. He dragged his thumbnail slowly down her back, applying pressure along the ridges of her spine, coming to rest where the curve of her back flowed into the swell of her ass. Bazine twitched involuntarily, pulsing, urging his hand further downward.

Hux lowered himself behind her slowly, replacing his hand with his mouth, wet and hot, nipping at her skin, skillfully mixing pain with pleasure without leaving any marks on her smooth skin. He inhaled her scent, her juices mixed with the muskiness of her ass, and Bazine let out a mewling sound as Hux begain tonguing her second entrance, pushing in and feeling the roughness of his tongue against the puckered, pink tissue. He took his fingers and pushed them roughly againt her cunt, inserting his fingers, scissoring and opening her up further as he lapped her from behind. Bazine began panting loudly, losing her self control, pushing her ass further into Hux's face.

Hux removed his fingers, slick with her moisture as her walls protested their exit. Bazine immediately felt their loss, but then Hux brought his fingers to his face, sucking her jucies and mixing them with his spit. He brought them dripping to her asshole, inserting one finger slowly, feeling its heat as her muscles adjusted to the intrusion. He inserted another and began drawing them in and out, fucking her with his hand slowly.

"Please, Hux," she begged, "Oh God, please..."

Hux was rock hard, precome leaking onto the front of his trousers. He fumbled with his zipper as his cock sprang free, swollen and red, thick in its girth. He released her wrists and turned her around, the foam coverings remaining as a reminder of his control. He gazed at Bazine, her pupils blown with lust, seeing his face reflected back in them, fierce, angry, his eyes glistening with desire.

"You're such dirty girl, Bazine. What is it you want from me? Tell me out loud." Lips cruel, knowing.

Bazine sobbed, craving release, bringing her hips forward to coax his huge cock into her waiting pussy. "Oh, God, please Hux. I want you to fuck me now. Fuck me, Hux, please, please..."

Hux shoved her against the wall, teased her with his tip at her entrance for a second before slamming his cock into her. There was no tenderness as he rutted angrily against her, feeling her damp walls welcome him as she wriggled and canted her hips to encourage him to drive even harder. He moved faster, feeling his balls tighten, as she grabbed his neck and hair, pulling him deeper within her, writhing, twisting, their juices mixing and dripping onto her leg. He felt her clenching and gasping as she began to come, her walls spasming as his cock grew impossibly harder, and knew that he couldn't hold off much longer.

He drew out of her suddenly as her contractures ebbed, and she whimpered in protest. Hux shoved Bazine down to her knees, his manhood dripping with a mixture of his precome and her climax, forcing her head and mouth on him as he proceeded to fuck her face. As he felt her tongue against his velvety length and the warmth of the back of her throat spasming against his tip, he became undone, watching as her eyes glistened with the hint of tears as she swallowed his come.


	5. Ultimatum

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey witnesses Snoke's true nature first hand as Hux sets his plan in motion.
> 
> [excerpt]:  
> Kylo seethed. Traditionally, he was not interested in relationships. Sure, he had wined, dined and fucked more than his fair share of women. He was not at a loss for companionship. His striking looks and cockiness made for a heady combination with his professional stature even in the ultra-competitive Manhattan social scene. But his work commitments left little time and energy to place elsewhere, and in truth, he never felt the desire for anything longer lasting."
> 
> Snoke stood, mouth set in a firm line. 
> 
> “And Ren? Do not dare to disobey me."

Rey tried to drown out the insistent knocking on the door by burying her head beneath her pillow. Unsuccessful, she opened her eyes slowly, slightly disoriented by the unfamiliar surroundings. The blue, windowless walls and white-tiled ceiling were stark reminders that she was not in the comfort of her own bed back home.

She glanced at her cell, squinting at the bright light emanating from the screen. 6:40 AM.

Thomas's voice interrupted from the other side of the door. "Rey? We're heading down to the cafeteria in five minutes before rounds. You coming?"

Rey disentangled herself from the sheets wrapped around her legs. "Yeah," she called out. “I'll meet you guys over there." She jumped out of bed, springs squeaking in mild protest, lacing her sneakers and grabbing her toiletries before heading to the bathroom. As she left, she spied the discarded styrofoam containers spilling out of the garbage, the sight and smell of congealing food lingering reminders of the night before.

Rey allowed herself to close her eyes briefly and think about Kylo. She also considered his suggestion that she join the research team at Arkanis. Although she had no desire to spend more time in Hux 's company than necessary and longed to return to the familiarity of Republic, she didn’t deny that this was a rare opportunity that could be a potential game changer for her career. She decided to ask Kylo more about his work when she had the chance.

A splash of cold water on her face helped knock the remaining sleep from her eyes. She brushed her hair quickly and tied it back, attempting to tame the stray wisps which insisted on escaping around her ears. She quickly shoved her backpack into her locker and headed towards the cafeteria, joining the rest of her team.

Phasma came up from behind, energized from her morning run. “Hey there,” she said, throwing her arm around Rey. "How'd the case go last night?"

"Amazing," said Rey. "Although we didn't get out until after 8. Dr. Ren allowed me to assist, and I closed up."

"Whooo, nice," Phasma whistled as she sat down beside her. "Not sure if I would have lasted on a five hour case after the day I had. Thanks for taking that one."

"No problem," Rey said, talking through a forkful of eggs as she tried to eat as much as she could before heading upstairs. “Nothing you wouldn’t have done for me if the roles were reversed.”

Phasma bit into a protein bar and washed it down with a thick, greenish-looking concoction. "Eh. Not so sure. I heard Ren has quite a temper on him when things don’t go his way. "

Rey rolled her eyes. "Oh my God Phasma, he and Hux were going at it all afternoon. It was like being stuck in a room with two kids! But Ren was incredible. I’d never been involved in a case like that before. It was all finesse and endurance under pressure. Like, literally one of the most amazing things I’ve ever seen.”

Phasma looked at her, laughing. "You jonesing to be a neurosurgeon, Rey? Or just jonesing after Ren? Not that I’d blame you, I mean look at the guy. And you know what they say, ‘Big hands, big….’" she winked as she made an obscene gesture.

Rey made a moue. “Honestly, Phasma!”

Phasma looked down at her cell. "Look, it’s been fun and games guys, but we've to start wrapping it up here. Let’s head on over to rounds.” Rey quickly downed her orange juice, scraped up the last of the egg with her toast and swallowed as she piled her tray on top of the others.

Luckily, Simon was running rounds that morning. It made for a laid back atmosphere, which was a welcome change after the breakneck activity yesterday. As the approached room 9, Rey gave a summary of the patient. "This is Mr. Slip, a 25 year old male with penetrating head trauma. Entrance wound to the left temporal region, no exit wound. Status post decompression and evacuation, now on propofol sedation and CMV ventilation." She peeked in at the monitor visible through the glass ICU walls. “Heart rate 110, O2 sat 100%. 100.8 temperature."

Simon asked "Follow up CT ordered for today? Fever work up sent?'

Rey read off the lab results. "CT's being done this morning."

They knocked on the door and entered. Ren was at the bedside, checking the monitoring system while Hux looked over the vent settings. The machine made a hissing sound through the tube, and Rey watched as it pumped oxygen rhythmically into the patient, creating a rise and fall in his chest. It was a strange juxtaposition of machine and man, partnered in a life sustaining process.

Ren looked up at the group. "Hi Simon. His ICP looks greatly improved today. If the CAT scan looks stable, we'll probably pull the drain tomorrow. Anything come back yet on the labs?"

"H and H stable, mild leukocytosis. Cultures pending for a low grade fever.

"Yes, well, the surgical site looks clean, hopefully it’s just a post-op fever. Call me if anything significant comes up." Ren looked at Rey. "Thanks for your assistance yesterday, Dr. Kenobi. Great work."

Phasma raised an eyebrow, nudging Rey.

Hux smirked, then turned towards Simon. "Keep the current vent settings for now. If the CAT scan looks stable, we'll start to wean him from sedation. I'm sure you guys can handle that."

Simon nodded his agreement. "No problem, we'll follow it up." The group left Hux and Ren as they moved to the next patient’s room.

After rounds, Simon gave the group a gentle reminder. "Listen guys, don't forget Grand Rounds at 12 in Auditorium One. Snoke's presenting . Finish up your to-do lists and charting as much as you can, but don’t be late. Trust me, you don’t want to get on his bad side."

Luckily, they were able to work efficiently that morning, and Rey reached the auditorium with James, Thomas and Phasma by 11:45. Sleep deprivation was starting to take effect, however, and she regretted not ordering coffee earlier that morning. She chose a seat in the middle row towards the end, where she was less likely to be in Snoke's direct line of sight. A large sign in front of the stage reminded her to set her phone on vibrate. Snoke entered, and the lights dimmed as he prepared to take the podium. The last of the audience had filtered in and taken their seats, and the hushed noises created a cocooning effect as Rey fought to stay awake.

"Today we are discussing the operative management of subdural hematomas. Options for treatment include burr hold trephination, craniotomies and craniectomies. In the first slide, we have a CAT scan of an acute subdural bleed. As you can see, the swelling is creating a midline shift. On the next cross section, we see evidence of impending herniation..."

Snoke's voice droned on quietly, and Rey's eye lids fluttered. The mix between the monotony of his voice, the warmth of the room and her fatigue swarmed around her. Her head felt heavy, unsupported by her neck muscles as it slowly pitched forward. She awoke suddenly, and tried to adjust her head back upright with a movement that was too quick and sudden to go completely unnoticed. She surreptitiously pinched her legs, a warning sign for her body to stay awake, but all she wanted to do was to close her eyes for just one minute, just one second more...

A sudden kick to the back of her chair jerked her awake, and she turned around to see Kylo sitting behind her. He gestured with a quick tilt of his head back to the podium, flashing a warning to where Snoke was turned towards the screen. Rey turned around quickly, mortified but grateful to be saved from what could have been a more public humiliation. As she settled back in her seat, she took note of Kylo’s legs framing her on either side of the chair. Suddenly she was very much awake, but unable to concentrate on Snoke any more than when she was dozing off a minute ago.

An electronic ring tone playing _The Imperial March_ broke through the silence in the auditorium, seeming to last forever although it was shut down in seconds. Some in the audience snickered as others turned slightly towards the source, where Dr. Unamo looked flustered. Snoke never turned from the screen, and for a brief moment Rey wondered if perhaps the sound went unnoticed by him.

Snoke continued. "Uncal herniations can compress the oculomotor nerve and posterior cerebral artery. Classic findings are a fixed, dilated pupil and paralysis on exam.” He turned around, facing the audience, his bony finger pointing to the fourth chair in the second row, accusation radiating from its tip. “Dr. Unamo. Fascinating, is it not, that you may share these very symptoms? Are you so visually impaired that you were unable to read the sign posted in front of the room, clearly stating that cells should be set on vibrate?"

Rey held her breath.

Snoke continued, like a snake cornering its prey. "Or is it possible that you lack the strength and agility in your fingers to adjust your ringer to its appropriate setting?” Snoke leaned forward with each question, closing in on the trembling girl. “Or perhaps it is because you find my lecture material too redundant and uninformative, unworthy of your attention?"

"No, sir. I do apologize, Dr. Snoke." Eyes fearful, imploring, a deer caught in headlights.

Phasma squirmed uncomfortably at the exchange. Many of the other residents suddenly became fascinated with their desk tops. Rey bit her lip and kept her hands fisted to her sides. She saw that Snoke was enjoying this, toying with Unamo's fear, her degradation.

"Well," Snoke hissed, finally striking. "If it isn't because of a visual or motor impairment or your prodigious knowledge, then I can only assume that it is because you lack common respect and courtesy for your superiors. Dr. Unamo, please excuse yourself immediately. You are no longer welcome in my classroom.”

Dr. Unamo, shocked, embarrassed, and a little uncertain, remained seated. Rey looked at her sympathetically, as Simon gently gestured for her to go. Snoke stared unyieldingly, reigning righteous judgment over her.

Rey felt Kylo's leg move instinctively closer, as if to physically shield her from Snoke’s wrath.

Dr. Uanamo face reddened, blinking back unshed tears as she picked up her things and exited the room. The door clicked behind her and Snoke returned to the screen, continuing as if nothing had happened.

Once lecture was over, Rey turned around to Kylo, furious. “Is he always like that?” she asked, not caring if her voice carried beyond the noise of moving chairs and desks and the residents milling about. "I was going to ask you more about your research, but I don’t think I could ever work under these conditions. I want a mentor who will be nurturing and supportive, not one who’s a power-hungry, dictatorial ass!”

Kylo looked at Rey. “Snoke’s more of a figurehead in these things, Rey. He’s done a lot of amazing things in his career to advance patient care. He has the name and recognition to get things funded and approved. But Hux and I are the true lead investigators, depending on the project.” He admonished Rey slightly. “Snoke is an extremely powerful ally to have, but an even more powerful enemy to make.”

As they spoke, Hux approached Snoke, speaking quietly with him. Snoke looked in Rey and Kylo's direction, frowned slightly, and then nodded. Hux didn't bother hiding the self-satisfied look in his eyes as he approached the pair.

"Spirited lecture, wasn't it, Dr. Kenobi?” He didn’t bother waiting for her response. “Ren. Snoke has requested your presence in his office."

 

**_______________________________________________**

 

Half an hour later, Kylo Ren sat in front of an empty chair, frowning slightly, uncertainty as to the purpose of this meeting. He stood as Snoke entered the room, while Snoke waved for him to be seated.

Snoke sighed. "Dr. Ren, you have such promise. I have seen it myself, reaching out to you personally fifteen years ago. Since then, you have continued to outshine your peers in your many successes, and have shown enormous leadership potential in a quickly changing field. I believed for many years, and still do, that you can continue Arkanis’ legacy as the leading medical institution in the world.”

Ren nodded his thanks, not sure where Snoke was heading with this line of thought.

Snoke frowned. "But something disturbs me. I have heard rumors, of a girl.”

Kylo was confused, his brow furrowing in response.

Snoke persisted, clarifying. “The one who scrubbed in on the case with you yesterday?"

"Dr. Kenobi? Yes, she assisted on the Slip case from Curoscant. Excellent physician, she already shows great promise. I was hoping to convince her to join my Amygdala Study."

Snoke looked at Kylo intently, assessing his incertitude.

Kylo suddenly felt like a fidgety ten-year old, but kept his posture and face as schooled as possible. “Sir?”

The door opened behind him and he turned quickly as Hux strode in. Kylo turned back to Snoke, a flash of anger as he realized Hux’s involvement.

"I am sorry, Dr. Ren, but as you are still on probation for previous behavioral issues, I cannot have you jeopardize your name and this department further with silly rumors, no matter how much or how little basis they may have in the truth. At this point, your image, your career-- everything that we’ve worked for-- can be destroyed with an accusation that you used your position for an advantage of a....personal nature.” Snoke let the words slide out, suggestively unfinished.

Ren for once almost felt at a loss for words. “She means nothing to me in that way, Sir.” The words didn’t sound convincing to his own ears even as they came out. Hux turned to him disbelieving, as Ren qualified his response. “I appreciate her intelligence and potential, and believe that she has much to offer to this department. I only wish to cultivate her interests in this direction.”

Snoke sighed. "Nonetheless, we have had several witnesses who saw you with her in interactions which—let’s say, are not in keeping with someone in your position.”

Kylo seethed. Traditionally, he was not interested in relationships. Sure, he had wined, dined and fucked more than his fair share of women. He was not at a loss for companionship. His striking looks and cockiness made for a heady combination with his professional stature even in the ultra-competitive Manhattan social scene. But his work commitments left little time and energy to place elsewhere, and in truth, he never felt the desire for anything longer lasting.

Rey however, was different. She was someone who could be his intellectual equal, and her beauty and feistiness made him curious and interested. Even though it was a bourgeoning relationship —whatever that relationship may be—he resented the fact that he wasn’t even being allowed an opportunity to see it through. Ren turned sideways to look at Hux, who stood by his side, straight faced and self-righteous.

Ren made one more plea. “Dr. Snoke, if you could just consider-“

Snoke lowered the blow. "Dr. Ren, starting immediately, I forbid you to have any contact with Dr. Kenobi outside the presence of another hospital employee. I cannot afford to have even the slightest hint of medical misconduct surrounding you. If Dr. Kenobi is truly the asset that you claim her to be, I want her working with Hux on his projects instead. There are plenty of other fish in the sea, I have no doubt you will catch another with ease. This is not up for further discussion.”

Snoke stood, mouth set in a firm line.

“And Ren? Do not dare to disobey me."

**_______________________________________________**

6 PM:

Rey stretched out, feeling re-energized. Showering away the grime of the last 30 hours made her feel refreshed and almost removed the bad taste of Snoke. She stretched out her legs. She was excited to be going out tonight, celebrating surviving her first week at Arkanis and having fun with Finn and Poe

On cue, Finn knocked on her bedroom door. “Rey? You need the shower?”

“Nope, all yours.”

“Are you sure? It may be awhile.”

“No, I’m good, I took one earlier, before my nap.”

Rey heard Finn’s bare feet pad towards the bathroom, followed by the sound of running water. She peered into her closet and decided to celebrate and dress up a bit tonight. She took out two outfits, holding them in front of her, going back and forth for a couple of minutes. Undecided, she marched out into the living room, intent on asking Poe’s opinion, which tended to be much better than hers in sartorial matters.

Finn and Poe’s door was open. Rey peeked in and she pushed it wider. “Poe?”

Empty. The shower water was running, and she heard murmuring and the sounds of two people moving around the wet tub. Oh, Rey thought, laughing. That’s why Finn was going to be awhile

OK, the beige tunic it was. Rey slipped the silky folds over her lithe frame, and allowed herself to indulge in a little vanity. The upper cut outs highlighted the definition in her shoulders and upper arms, and the V neck softly fell in all the right places to flatter her curves. A cinched belt accentuated her tiny waist, while the side slits hinted at her hips. She paired the top with leggings and a pair of tall, high-heeled boots. As she turned to her side to get another angle in the mirror, she felt beautiful and powerful, reveling in her femininity.

She brushed a hint of bronzer above her cheeks, and outlined her eyes, the kohl making her hazel eyes darker and more mysterious. She brushed her hair up into a high ponytail, the effect highlighting her delicate facial features and rosy lips. A pair of gold hoops completed the look.

“Damn,” Finn let out a low whistle, towel around his waist. “How is it that you don’t have a million guys falling all over themselves for you? “

Rey laughed, “Aww, thanks Finn. You know it’s because you and Poe have ruined all men for me. No one’s going to live up to that kind of standard.”

“Well, whoever you do end up with is going to be luckiest guy in the world.” Finn backed from the doorway, laughing as Rey pretended to grab at his towel.

The three of them headed out as dusk was falling over the Manhattan skyline. Poe, ever in charge of their social calendars, had heard about a fantastic restaurant downtown. Corellia had great food, free music, a fun atmosphere and, most importantly, was affordable on their budget. By the time they took the 3 Train to the West Village, it was already dark. Rey walked around, window shopping in front of the brightly lit boutique and specialty shops. The trio passed by restaurants, some of them hidden down small alleyways, others tucked several steps below street level. There was an exciting energy in the Village, the bustle of college students out on a Friday night mixed with couples and hipsters.

Several blocks away from Corellia, a large crowd had gathered. Rey looked at Poe. “What do you think is going on over there?”

“Oh, that’s just the line to get into Naboo,” Poe said. Finn and Rey looked at him quizzically. “Naboo is one of the best Japanese restaurants in the country. It’s run by a celebrity chef, a former James Beard winner. Some insane blend of Japanese and South American cuisine. Impossible to get in, and if you do, you pay a fortune.”

“Like, how much?” asked Finn

“Let’s put it this way. One meal at Naboo equals one whole month of groceries for the three of us.”

“Ouch,” said Rey, wincing. Nothing could be worth that much money, no matter how delicious.

“Let’s take a look at the menu for shit and giggles,” Finn said, pulling Rey alongside him. He grabbed her hand and ran up, nearly knocking over a couple as they were exiting the restaurant.

Rey looked up to apologize as her voice suddenly caught in her throat. The man was breathtakingly beautiful. He wore a suit which was undeniably custom-made, hugging every inch of his broad shoulders and chest perfectly. His elbow was crooked out for his companion’s arm as she giggled and leaned into him, her tight black dress highlighting a model’s body and self-assuredness. He took a look at Rey and Finn, his eyes flashing dangerously and narrowing slightly, as a lock of ebony hair fell over his eyes. The woman instinctively pushed closer, grabbing his arm tightly and resting her head on his shoulder possessively.

Rey gripped Finn’s hand more tightly, feeling like she would fall over, her breath coming too quickly, unable to catch enough air.

“Kylo,” Rey whispered.

He nodded, his face like stone. “Dr. Kenobi.”


	6. "Rey"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo tries his best to obey Snoke's orders  
> *mildly explicit scene
> 
> [excerpt]:  
> She was the third one in three days, each one gorgeous and each one replaceable. Nothing worked. He was tired of their meaningless pratter, their lack of connection. He was like a school boy, unsatiated.

Kylo stepped out onto the terrace, panic setting in like waves. He couldn't escape the cloying, stifling sense of suffocation mixed with a paradoxical sense of emptiness. Even outside, the surrounding buildings felt constricting, their bricked and concrete walls closing in, crowding the street and into his space, making it difficult for him to breathe. He was physically spent, emotionally exhausted, and completely unsatisfied.

"Kylo?" A feminine voice interrupted from behind.

Kylo Ren turned. She was beautiful, physically perfect, every man's wet dream. Her blonde hair cascaded down over her fully bared breasts, her dusky red nipples begging to be suckled. Her flat belly flared out into womanly hips and a spectacular ass that were meant to be worshipped. Her lips were set into a full pout, wet and reddened, full of the promise of all the wicked things that she could do to his body. Her green eyes were half-lidded, still full of desire even though she had just come in his arms not even 15 minutes earlier. She placed her hand on his shoulder, tracing the muscles along his upper back, pressing her chest seductively against his skin, and whispered filthy thoughts into his ear.

She was the third one in three days, each one gorgeous and each one replaceable. Nothing worked. He was tired of their meaningless pratter, their lack of connection. He was like a school boy, unsatiated.

Kylo still couldn't get Rey out of his mind. He thought back to Friday night, when he saw her outside of Naboo, her gorgeous face registering quick surprise, her mouth partly opened, inviting and breathless, an unspoken apology on her lips. And his feelings quickly turned to anger fueled by a spark of jealousy when he thought about her companion, a handsome man with whom she obviously shared a deep connection, holding her hand, supporting her, touching her skin.

Rey's crestfallen expression tore into him. He wanted to be the one to hold her, to caress her face, to kiss away her pain. He turned to the blonde behind him, taking her mouth to his, bruising them in an attempt to claim them, crushing her breasts against his bare chest. He imagined hazel eyes in place of green, a face enhanced by delicate features and an upturned nose, an impertinent mouth that would spar with him in words as well as in a kiss. And he felt himself getting hard again, grinding his hips against her, pushing and claiming with his tongue, sloppy, demanding and alive.

She moaned into his mouth, snaking her hands into his glorious hair, pulling his head down further into hers. She felt his hands pull her closer, his desire growing as she reached down for his manhood. He grew hard in her hand as her slender fingers encircled him, stroking him insistently along his impressive length, increasing their pressure and speed as he began to throb. He leaned into her, willing himself to give in to the sensations, and he let out an involuntary groan as he breathed into her.

_"Rey."_

He watched as hazel eyes reverted back to green, brown hair to blonde, and her hand left his cock to leave a hard, red mark across his cheek.

He didn't even bother turning around as she grabbed her things to storm out.

"Fuck you, Kylo!" she screamed, slamming the door behind her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was originally going to be part of another chapter, but I felt that it was more appropriate as a small stand alone. A hint of tortured, jealous Kylo to come......


	7. Forget Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey and her fellow residents attend a party where the drinks are flowing and things take an unsettling turn.  
> *mildly suggestive scene, slightly dark due to alcohol and drug references
> 
> [excerpt]:  
> The coolness and relative quiet of the bricked corridor leading to the restrooms was a welcome change from the heat and noise of the dance floor. As she was about to enter, a strong arm grabbed her, pushing her against the wall.
> 
> She looked up. Kylo's eyes glinted back at her angrily, his face inches from her own. He held her wrist tightly, almost painfully, entrapping her.
> 
> Rey felt unfocused as the music continued to pound in the distance, intimidated by his strength and presence.
> 
> "What do you think you're doing?" he hissed.

By the third mile, Poe was starting to think that he should have left Rey sitting by herself on the couch all afternoon. Finn was working that weekend, so Poe was left to suffer through her questionable movie choices for an entire morning without the benefit of additional male input as he tried to lend his support.

After the sixth hour, he had had enough.

Poe strode over to Rey, grabbed the remote from her hand and shut off the television.

"Rey?" he asked. "You know I love you, but if I have to watch one more Nicholas Sparks or John Green movie--or anything that has "Love" in its title for that matter--I’m going to throw the TV through the wall. And I'd hate to do that, since it’s mine and I’m kind of attached to it."

Rey glowered at him from her half-eaten pint of Ben and Jerry's and pulled her blanket further up around her.

Poe finally convinced her to go for a run to work off some of her negative energy. Half an hour later, Rey looked like she had just started, while his lungs were on fire.

“Rey, you’re literally going to run me into the ground at this pace. Can we slow it down a bit? Or even better, take a break?”

Rey gave him a sideways glance and felt a pang of guilt. He was trying valiantly to keep up and failing miserably. His damp curls were plastered against his forehead, his breath coming up in shallow huffs, and his face had the look of someone who would rather be anywhere but here. She took pity and slowed herself down to an eventual walk.

“Sorry, Poe. Of course we can." She gave him a smile. "Thanks for helping me get out of my funk.”

They cooled down and stopped by a small park to sit. The afternoon sun was beautiful, and a gentle wind rustled the leaves overhanging the bench, still green, their shadows flickering below like a kinetoscope. The sounds of laughing children and their scolding parents mixed with the colors of the painted pavement and vibrant swing sets. Rey breathed deeply, allowing the sights and sounds to settle her spirit and empty her mind.

When she opened her eyes, Poe was looking at her, his eyes gentle and warm, protective, patient.

Rey sighed. "You know, Arkanis isn’t half-bad. I miss you guys like crazy, but a lot of the residents are really nice. I’m having fun, and I get to see a lot of things that we don’t do at Republic.” She bit her lip. “Kylo was one of the first attendings to show trust in my skills. He seemed so kind and encouraging….so sweet.”

She closed her eyes, recalling how he held her, how his touch seared her senses. “I thought there was a connection between us. Maybe I was just imagining things. I’ve been on my own for so long I’m not good at reading signals anymore. I mean, you saw him. You saw who he was with. Why would someone like that be interested in someone like me?”

Poe looked at her gently. "Why wouldn't he be? You're gorgeous, Rey, and I'm not just talking about on the outside. You’ve got brains and beauty, and you're all heart and loyalty. If it weren't for Finn--well, and the fact that I’m into guys--I'd scoop you up in a second."

Rey looked up to Poe and gave a wistful smile. "Poe, seriously, what am I going to do? I’ve got another seven weeks to go."

Poe thought. "Why don't you ask him about his research and see if it's something you want to do? If you’re interested, join his team. You'll get a chance to do something you're excited about, and you'll spend more time working with him in the process. Really get to know him. Maybe he's not worth your efforts, or maybe he's the guy who’s going to sweep you off your feet. But you won't know if you don't try." Poe looked at her, a challenge in his eyes. "And I’ve never thought of you as the kind of person who would back away from something meaningful.”

Rey mulled over his words and agreed. "OK, I'm going to do it tomorrow." Poe’s hug was full of encouragement and support, and it was the best she had felt in over 48 hours.

**________________________________________**

 

Rey approached Maz on Monday.

"Hi, Maz. Can you tell me if Dr. Ren is in?  He mentioned something last week about working on one of his grants. "

Maz looked up. "Sure, dear, his office is down the hallway and to the right.  First door on your left."  Maz looked at Rey thoughtfully.  “Dr. Stanley has had many wonderful things to say about you. How has your experience with us been so far?"

Rey contemplated her question and answered her honestly. “It's different from what I'm used to, but not in a bad way.  I'm learning alot.  I've met so many wonderful people, and Simon is the best chief ever."  She remembered something else.  "Oh, and the food is amazing!"

Maz laughed.

"I'm happy to be here, Maz.  Thanks for asking."

Maz looked at Rey. "We're glad to have you here too, Dr. Kenobi."  She glanced at the clock overhead.  "It's 12:30.  You should be able to catch Dr. Ren in his office right now if you hurry. His patient hours start at 1:00."

Rey smiled gratefully.  "Thank you, Maz!"

The hallways were bustling as patients moved throughout the hospital.  Some lay on stretchers, worried looks on their faces, holding the hands of their loved ones en route to the OR.  Others leaned back in their wheelchairs, smiling and making small talk with the transporters in an effort to mask their uncertainty as they headed towards various tests.  None were completely confident due to the position they were placed in and all were doing their best to put their trust and faith in those who were managing their care.

Rey escaped the activity of the main corrider and turned right to the row of private offices.  The rich, mahogany doors were a warm counterpoint to the sterility of the hospital walls.  She lifted her hand towards the one inscribed "Kylo Ren, M.D." and knocked

She felt a flare of nervousness as his deep voice called from within.

"Come in."

She turned the handle and pushed.  Kylo sat behind his desk, his white physician’s coat pressed and spotless over an elegant shirt and tie, charts neatly stacked on his desk.  On display were his numerous awards and accolades, their variegated frames landscaping every inch of the wall behind him. Textbooks and journals filled a bookshelf to the side.  A picture of him and Snoke sat on the top shelf.  They were holding a medal, Snoke's and Ren's hands on either side of the presentation case, flanked by dignitaries, all smiling for the camera.  The only thing hinting at disorder in the room were the numerous cups of coffee which spilled out over the garbage in various states of consumption.

His eyes seemed to startle fractionally as Rey entered, but his expression otherwise remained inscrutable.

"Dr. Kenobi." He shook his head as Rey went to close the door behind her. "Please. Leave it opened."

Rey walked forward tentatively, his cold formality causing her confusion. "Dr. Ren.  I'd like to speak with you about your research. I’ve given it a lot of thought over the weekend, and I’m very interested in participating.  I was wondering if—“

Kylo cut her off abruptly.  "I’m very sorry, Dr. Kenobi. All of the research slots on my current projects have been filled."

Rey's mouth dropped open. "All of them? Since last week?”

“Yes," he said, his eyes flashing a curious mix of anger and sadness. His look darkened as he ground out the next words.  "If you are truly interested, I believe that Dr. Hux may have some openings on his team."

Deep down, he was fervently hoping that she would decline.

Rey sputtered, too shocked to negate the possibility outright.  Kylo's eyes narrowed, nettled by her lack of a verbal response.

She looked down at the floor, then back up again, uncertainty stamped on her face.  She didn’t know him at all.  It wasn’t just the cold and impersonal nature of his words.  It was the way he was looking at her, the tension in his carriage, the displeasure underlying his actions.

She forgot her place, needing to know.   "Dr. Ren, if I may be so bold.  You had recently spoken of working together as a team.  Have I done something since then to offend you?   Have I overstepped my bounds in anyway?  If I did, I sincerely apologize, I--"

Kylo stood, and walked towards her, towering over her petite frame. "Dr. Kenobi, your line of questioning is entirely inappropriate.  Please remember that I am one of your supervisors.   I hope you will keep this in mind and not color any of our previous interactions with a schoolgirl's fantasies."  His persisted, cruel in his words in order to drive the wedge between them further.

"Be mindful of your place, Dr. Kenobi."  He stood near the door to usher her out. "And now, if you'll excuse me, I have patients to see."

Rey's face burned in embarrassment and anger.  How could she have misjudged him so?

She held her head high.  “I will make sure that I always know my place, Dr. Ren."

Kylo watched as she walked out his door and down the hall, unable to look away until she disappeared around the corner and out of his sight.  Closing the door, he paced back and forth, raging at his impotence.  He stood in front of the window, eyeing the picture of him and Snoke.   Hands trembling, he held it and stared at the image, his anger directed at the man who was puppetering his life and at himself for allowing him to do so.  Unable to deal with his feelings of shame, he hurled it against the wall, extracting little pleasure from the resulting cacophony of shattering wood and broken glass.

Rey rounded the corner back to the surgical suite.  She marched up to Maz.

“Maz?  Would you mind giving me the extension for Dr. Hux?”

  
**___________________________________**

Over the next several weeks, Rey kept her head down and threw herself into her work. She avoided cases with Ren, even choosing to scrub in with Hux on occasion. The way Hux ran the OR like a precision machine made her uncomfortable however, and she tried to avoid neurosurgical cases altogether whenever possible.

Rey was charting in the residents' room with James when Phasma entered.

Phasma sat down next to them, her posture betraying her exhaustion after the long day. "So, are you guys going to the party this weekend?"

The Department of Surgery periodically threw end-of-rotation parties for residents of the transitional program who completed their monthly surgical electives. In reality, it served several purposes: it allowed the department to show their appreciation for their own surgical residents; it fostered a sense of comraderie and pride within the department; and it allowed the department to flaunt its wealth and superiority over the other medical divisions which didn't have the resources for such indulgences. Traditionally, the parties were held in staid and pricey restaurants, but this time Bazine was in charge of the planning. Through her connections, she was able to book a private room in Tatooine. Tatooine was both a restaurant and a club, a mecca of New York City nightlife. It frequently made the entertainment news for its after parties, celebrity sightings, and the occasional brawl.

James nodded. "Definitely. Poor Unamo and Godrich. They're going to miss out because of call. You going, Rey?"

Rey looked uncomfortable. She didn't want to run the risk of seeing Kylo there.

"Oh come on, Rey," Phasma urged. "My brother and his girlfriend are in town for the weekend, and I'm ditching them for a couple of hours to go. It's going to be amazing, they never throw parties at places like this. Open bar. Plus, I never get a chance to hang out with you outside of work."

"Isn't it going to be weird with all the attendings and everything?"

James shook his head. "Nah. They usually make an obligatory appearance for an hour or so, get their food and go. Since this isn't a dinner, I can't imagine most of them even showing up."

Rey thought about it and nodded. It would be nice to hang out with her new friends outside of the hospital.

"OK, sounds like fun."

"Don't forget to let Maz know you're going so she can put you on the guest list," Phasma reminded her.

 

**_____________________________________________**

 

Rey was actually excited by the time Friday night arrived. Finn and Poe were heading out with friends that evening as well and made her promise to give all the salacious details the next morning. She allowed herself to splurge on a cab, not wanting to take the subway at night by herself in heels. She relaxed against the cracked leather of the back seat for the long ride downtown.

"West 12th and 9th Avenue, please."

The cab pulled up half an hour later to Tatooine. There was already a line outside the door filled with attractive people waiting to get in. An exotic passageway decorated by plush couches accented with silken pillows led the way to the restaurant which sat on the ground floor. Amber colored sconces warmed the deep wooden tones of the wall, highlighted by colorful ethnic art. Tables were set in a circular pattern as waiters navigated the dimly lit room. Chandeliers sparkled overhead, diffusing soft light through crystal prisms onto the scene below. Rey noted the appreciative look some of the male patrons threw in her direction as the hostess led her to the club area upstairs.

The upstairs lounge was also dimly lit, but had a distinctly different vibe. Furniture in jeweled tones of cobalt blues, regal amethyst and glistening golds invited people to sit and linger. Individual rooms off of the main dance floor lent a degree of privacy from the crowd. The bar ran the length of the main room, its backlit mosaicked panel lighting the way, a beckoning invitation urging thirsty clubgoers to indulge. The DJ was situated in the booth nearby, mixing inimitable lounge beats, sending out a primal, thumping base which pulsated over the room. Rey looked around and spied Phasma and Thomas, who were excitedly waving her over.

"As much as I hate to admit it, Bazine really outdid herelf," Phasma said as Rey joined them.

James widened his eyes in appreciation as he saw her. "Wow, Rey, you look hot."

Rey was dressed in a form fitting black camisole top, it's cropped length hinting at her toned belly. Dark blue skinny jeans rode low on her hips, paired with stilettoed ankle boots which added another 4 inches to her frame. A short black leather jacket added a bit of modesty and highlighted the delicate length of her neck. Her hair fell to her shoulders in soft, loose waves, it's femininity contrasting with the leather underneath.

"Awww, thanks James. As do you," Rey replied, feeling rather chuffed. She kissed him on the cheek as he blushed at the greeting.

"Come, let's get a drink." Phasma said, pulling her towards the bar.

The hostess was leading more groups upstairs as Rey ordered a cosmoplitan and Phasma a martini. Rey took a sip, the texture of tiny ice crystals playfully stinging her lips as the mix of cointreau and vodka swirled in her mouth, sweetness tempered by the tartness of cranberry and lime. The alcohol made her feel relaxed, amplifying the sounds and sights of the room, as it progressively became more crowded, heated and loud.

There was a brief commotion and the buzz of a hundred whispers filled the air as heads turned surreptitiously to view the next entrants. A tall male with jet black hair frosted at the tips and gelled into spikes sauntered in, confident and commanding of the room. He had an easy swagger, and his black lined eyes surveyed the room until he spied the roped off booths in the back.

"Who is that?" Rey asked Phasma

"That's Mos Eisley. He's the lead singer of Figrin D'an and the Modal Nodes. I think they're playing The Garden tomorrow."

A group of women and a large burly bodyguard were crowded around him. A third male brought up the rear of the entourage, towering above the group with his 6'3" frame.

Rey recognized him right away. "How does he know Dr. Ren?"

Thomas joined in. "I heard that Ren helped him out with one of the band members a couple of years ago. The guy was on a bender, totally wasted and fucking around when he fell off an overpass. He sustained a massive head injury. Ren performed the surgery and helped keep the sordid details out of the press. The guy survived, but he's still got some major memory problems. He plays occasionally on some of their albums, but he's no longer in any shape to tour with the band."

Rey watched as the group was led to the back, settling into their table. The security guard was stationed in front, and the women flanked the two seated men on either side, draping themselves around them.

Kylo looked out across the scene with a slightly bored expression on his face until he laid eyes on Rey.

He felt his breath hitch and a slam in his gut as he was assaulted by the sight of her. He hadn't seen her since their confrontation in his office two weeks ago, and never had he seen her looking like this. Her top pushed up her breasts, as if to proffer them for his hands and mouth to revere. Her heels aligned her body in such as way as to lengthen her legs and accentuate her ass. Her hair, usually pulled back from her face, fell softly in loose waves, silk against skin. Her face was slightly flushed from her drink and the heat of the room, her lips reddened and soft, begging to be kissed.

She looked so beautiful and so utterly fuckable.

Rey turned to James and Phasma and the rest of their group . "Anyone want another before they shut down Open Bar?" Taking orders, she weaved her way through the throngs of partygoers to the side of the room.

"Two Heinekens, one Silver Tree on the rocks, and a Rum and Coke, please." Rey left a ten on the counter as the bartender turned to make the drinks.

"Planning for a long night?" Rey felt a light touch on her arm from the man seated next to her, his hand lingering with unwanted familiarity. She looked up to see Hux. His handsome face was appraising her, his eyes assessing her body and she drew back slightly.

"Dr. Kenobi." He inclined his head, a slight leer in his expression.

Rey shrunk back as he leaned forward in his seat. The crowd behind them also added to her discomfiture as they tried to compete for the bartender's attention, pushing Hux further into her space.

Hux continued, eyes steadily on Rey. "Maz told me that you were looking for me the other day?"

"Yes, Dr. Hux. I had considered applying for one of the research positions within your department. However, I realized since that I don't have the time to give it it's just due, especially as I only have one month left on my rotation at Arkanis."

Hux slowly trailed his finger from her upper arm and rested it on the back of her hand. She felt trapped, unable to withdraw it without being obviously rude. He suggestively rubbed the edge of her thumb.

"Rey," he said, a predatory look in his eyes. "You may not have an opportunity like this again. The prestige and power of Arkanis, the reputation of Snoke and myself behind this project. I would be willing to make allowances for your schedule even after your rotation here has finished. It would be worth your while to reconsider." The pressure was becoming more insistent and demanding, his hand stroking hers in bigger circles as he moved closer.

Hux moved suddenly as someone bumped into him from behind, pushing him forward from his chair. Hux used his arms to brace himself against the bar as Rey withdrew her hand quickly. He angrily looked behind him to see Kylo standing over him, sneering.

"Goddammit Ren, watch where you're going!"

"Hux. My apologies." he said sarcastically, barely repressing the anger in his voice. His hair hung forward into his face, eyes glinting dangerously, his powerful body moving closer.

The two men stared each other down while Rey grabbed her drinks and begged a hasty retreat back to her friends.

Perhaps it was the alcohol, the lighting, the bass moving through her, or her need to forget. Rey just wanted to have fun and let loose. She took off her jacket and the group moved onto the dance floor, joining the other revelers. She let the music take over her senses, its pounding, pulsating beat a primitive driving force pushing her forward. She closed her eyes, raised her arms, and moved closer to James and Thomas, hips moving suggestively, the space between their bodies closing in.

The dance floor became progressively more crowded as other clubgoers entered their circle. A handsome man moved towards her, insinuating his body next to hers, moving in then withdrawing slightly, back and forth as the music continued to contract and expand. Drinks flowed as Rey moved with and against the men and women surrounding her. Kylo watched Rey from the darkness of his booth in the back of the room, ignorant of his immediate surroundings. His eyes burned with lust, unable to look away as he watched her body writhing, inviting and free. She was intoxicated by the music, disinhibited by the booze, the dance floor throbbing and the angles of the walls tilting, shimmering and shifting with each turbo bass beat.

Rey was feeling flushed, her top clinging to her body, outlining every curve and movement of her chest. Colors and noise started to meld into one, a million sensations intense in their acuity, euphoria mixing, spinning and distorting with time. She suddenly felt overly warm and slightly disoriented, and excused herself from the group to head towards the bathroom.

The coolness and relative quiet of the bricked corridor leading to the restrooms was a welcome change from the heat and noise of the dance floor. As she was about to enter, a strong arm grabbed her, pushing her against the wall.

She looked up. Kylo's eyes glinted back at her angrily, his face inches from her own. He held her wrist tightly, almost painfully, entrapping her.

Rey felt unfocused as the music continued to pound in the distance, intimidated by his strength and presence.

"What do you think you're doing?" he hissed.

"Having fun," she retorted, a slight slur to her words. "What are you doing?"

"I'm watching you make a fool of yourself. Behaving like a harlot."

"You're one to talk. I've seen the women you keep in your company," She spat out the words, laced with a hint of jealousy. "Isn't that what you like, Dr. Ren?"

She grew bolder, sliding her body towards him suggestively. "Isn't _this_ what you want?"

His voice strangled in his throat. He pressed forward so his right leg straddled her hip, his arms encircling her face, a feral look in his eyes as he responded.

"Be careful what you ask for, Rey. You just might get it."

The music pulsed and became distorted as he lowered his head to hers, crushing the softness of her lips with the hardness of his own, punishing her for her wantonness and for his lack of control. The searing heat of the kiss burned her lips. She inhaled the scent of his cologne as she moaned, feeling his tongue pressing against hers, tasting the mix of alcohol and sweat, trying to erase the memory of anyone she's kissed before. His tongue warred, bruised, and claimed her own. She responded as her fingers twisted in his shirt and pulled him down, arms moving up to knot his hair, wallowing in his essence, his masculinity.

He brought his hands down to her waist, pulling her closer as his knee worked her legs apart. He felt needy, unable to get enough of her as she arched into him, repositioning her legs despite the sounds of protest from the sticky floor. He was rock hard, grinding his erection against her thigh, trying to get her to submit despite all the layers of clothing between them. Her fingers splayed against the hardness of his chest, clenching, grasping, voracious in her need for him, only slowing down as a slight nausea began to build in her stomach.

Rey pulled back, dizzy and uncertain, and stumbled slightly against the wall, Her legs felt weak and she noted a confusion in his eyes as he made the effort to draw back from their kiss. She was staring, trying to focus, hearing a babbling in the background which could have been her own.

"Rey?" His voice sounded slightly distant.

Her head was spinning, the room blurred, tilting. Kylo's worried eyes swarmed in and out of focus.

"REY?!"

She was breathing erratically, pupils dilated, eyes glassy. He took her hand and led her back to her table, eyeing the drink which sat on it, a tell tale bluish tinge in the candlelight.

Rohypnol.

Kylo scanned the room furiously, unable to discern the perpetrator in the sea of moving bodies. He brought Rey over to Phasma, whose eyes widened in shock as she saw Rey.

"Shit, what happened?!"

"Someone spiked her drink," Kylo replied angrily. "Rohypnol."

Phasma looked confused

"Rohypnol." Kylo expanded. "Roofies, Forget Me, Memory Erasers?"

"Shit, we've got to get her out of here."

Kylo looked around. "We can't leave her alone. With all the alcohol she's taken and God knows how much of this drug, someone has to keep an eye on her. Can you take her back to your place?"

Phasms shook her head slowly. "My brother and his girlfriend are in from town and have my bedroom. I've been relegated to the couch as it is."

Kylo looked around. Thomas and James were getting lucky with some pretty randoms, and there was no way he could trust Rey with Hux or Bazine. Phasma dialed Rey's home number, with no response.

Rey hung onto Kylo and Phasma, legs unsteady.

Kylo made a quick decision. "Help me, Phasma." They loaded Rey into the back of the cab and climbed in next to her.

"Church Street, between Franklin and Leonard. And step on it."

When they arrived, Phasma and Ren helped Rey out of the cab. He kept the meter running as they brought her to the bank of elevator doors. Kylo handed Phasma enough money to cover the cab fare and then some.

Phasma tried to keep the hysteria from creeping into her voice. "Are you sure you're okay with this? Is she going to be okay?"

"Yes, Phasma, " although Kylo was uncertain himself. "Thanks for your help. I'll take her to the hospital if her condition worsens." He gently nudged her along. "Go on, get home before the driver takes off with another fare." Phasma nodded, giving him a look of encouragement as she climbed back in the cab and drove off.

Kylo and Rey rode up to the top floor, the stillness in the elevator broken by an electronic pinging noise announcing each passing floor. Rey leaned more heavily into him, breathing in the scent of his jacket.

"Come on, Rey, we're almost there," he whispered gently as the doors opened. He supported her as they walked down the hallway to his apartment. As he fumbled with his keys at the door, she looked up at him, eyes opened wide in a fleeting moment of clarity.

"Kylo..." she said, full of trust and love, volumes of meaning in her unfinished sentence. Her legs suddenly gave way and she fainted, her weight collapsing against him. He held her body tightly to his, breaking her fall.

 _Shit_ , he thought, wondering what he had gotten himself into as he gathered her up in his arms and carried her in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jess444 asked about a soundtrack for this chapter:
> 
> 1) "I took a pill in Ibiza" - Mike Posner (Amp or SeeB Remix). Title reference  
> 2) "Lean On" -Major Lazer and DJ Snake ^^  
> 3) "Slow Acid"-Calvin Harris


	8. Remember This

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey awakens in Kylo Ren's apartment with incomplete memories of the night before. Tooth-rotting fluff and (a lot of) smut ensues. Reylo.  
> *Explicit content, consensual sex
> 
>    
> [excerpt]:  
> Rey leaned her head gently into his touch, experiencing a sudden rush of longing and want. She wanted to assuage his jealousy, his insecurity, and she tilted her face to replace her cheek with the softness of her lips against his hand as he groaned with his need for her.
> 
> _"Rey."_
> 
> He pulled her close and brought his lips to hers.

4 AM

Rey was drifting in and out, the weight of her arms and legs holding her captive while her mind floated above, suspended. It was as if her body resided on another plane separate from her consciousness, locked and caged. She attempted to move, to scream, to do something to defy her stuporous state.

She remained immobile, physiologic restraints preventing physical movement. Perhaps she could concentrate all her efforts into one singular motion.

She focused her energies.

One.

Only silence.

Two.

Merely stillness.

She suddenly became aware of another presence in the room.  Someone or something was watching her.  She felt suffocated and dangerously helpless.

Three.

Her eyelids fluttered open slowly.

She blinked several times, adjusting to the fogginess as she tried to clear her head and make sense of her surroundings. Moonlight flooded in through a wall of glass, its soft beams illuminating her through a background of fading Manhattan lights.

She glanced around the room.

The space was large and unfamiliar. From her position she saw someone in the corner, their head lowered.

_Where was she?_

She tried to lift her head but felt a dull headache, a weightiness as he moved, approaching her from within the shadows. His silhouette provided sanctuary for his identity until he was standing in front of her.

 _Kylo_ , she thought, confusion evident in her countenance. Her eyes tried to focus as his handsome face swam into view.

Kylo eyed her tentatively as he approached her. He reached out gently, the barest of touches on her face.

"Rey," he whispered softly, a hint of relief in his voice. “You’re awake.”

She was still disoriented, not understanding where she was and why he was there.

"Where am I?" she asked.

"You're in my apartment." He watched her carefully, his words measured.

 _His_ _apartment?_ She noticed that her jeans were gone, and that she was dressed in a tee several sizes too large. She took a look at his rumpled shirt, sleeves rolled, unbuttoned and unkempt. Rey tried do move, becoming slightly agitated.

"Hold on." He came over and checked her pulse and pressure. "Ok, you can sit up. Slowly." He gently helped her into a sitting position and removed the cuff.

His touch sparked something transient, a fleeting impression in her mind: an impression of his lips, his hands on her, followed by the memory of someone grabbing her wrist, pushing up against her.

Sensations and missing memories colluded in a haze, misty and ephemeral. She was trying to hold onto the wisps but they floated away, dissolving in her grasp.

The words tumbled out before she could stop them

"What did you do to me?"

She saw the hurt look on his face following her accusation, quickly replaced by an unreadable expression.

"Rey, someone slipped Rohypnol in your drink. Phasma and I brought you over here so we could make sure that you were alright. I've been monitoring you all night."

Certain images came rushing back as her brain tried to adjust to the shock of his news. She remembered entering Tatooine and meeting Phasma, Thomas and James. She remembered getting drinks at the bar and Kylo’s confrontation with Hux. She remembered dancing and having a good time.

She couldn't remember anything after that.

Kylo prodded her gently. "How are you feeling right now?"

"Like I drank too much. Oh god, did I do anything stupid?" She put her head in her hands. She had a splitting headache and she felt nauseous, which was only amplified by her embarrassment at her situation.

"Rey, this is nothing that you did." His voice took on a steely tone. "Some worthless piece of shit thought to take advantage of you." He held her face, an intensity and anger in his eyes. She felt a jolt as another image hurtled towards her: Kylo, his face near hers, furious and demanding, the heat of his body provoking pleasurable sensations as well as something more dangerous and needy. Before its context could materialize completely, it too was gone.

Kylo dropped his hand quickly, as if sharing in her recollection. He went over to the kitchen and came back with a bottled water and some crackers.

He twisted off the cap and handed it to her. "Drink this. If you can, try to get a little of the food down as well. You'll feel better in the morning. "

Rey chewed slowly, feeling her stomach settle somewhat.

"Kylo?"

He looked at her, his expression guarded and unreadable.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome," he said gruffly. “Now try to get some rest." He stood.

She suddenly felt empty and scared, vulnerable in the large, unfamiliar space of his apartment.

"Where are you going?"

"You're doing better now. I'm going to try to get some rest as well." He gave a wry smile. "I'll be outside in the living room if you need me. You'd be surprised how comfortable that couch is."

She took a deep breath as the words rushed out. "Please don't go."

He stood still for a second, conflicted, trying to tamp down the barrage of feelings which were roiling inside of him.

"Please...” she said, almost begging. “I don't want to be alone." Her next request was that of a child, in response to a need she hadn’t felt in years.

"Just hold me?"

He sat down next to her and took her in his arms. Her small frame fit perfectly within his and she quickly fell asleep against his chest, her respirations settling. As he laid her down, he breathed in the scent of her hair, pulling her closer against him even as he felt a flare of desire, a response to her body pressed against his. His libidinous thoughts lessened and were replaced by a fierce protectiveness as he watched her face, peaceful and trusting. Holding her, he gave in to his exhaustion, tempered by a feeling of fullness which he had been missing for weeks.

 

**__________________________________________________**

 

Rey awoke to the warmth of the mid-morning sun. She opened her eyes lazily, several seconds passing before she realized that she was still in Kylo’s apartment. The weight of his arm laid against her hip, and there was the feel of something else pressing into her back. Something long and hard.

She giggled. Phasma was right about hand-size relationships.

She gently shifted her body and watched him sleep. He looked younger, almost peaceful, his strong brows no longer furrowed, full lips no longer set in a firm line. His lashes were long, almost beautiful, and she longed to brush aside the lock of hair which fell across his forehead. Two beauty marks near his jawline added interest to the landscape of his lower face, which had also taken on a five o’clock shadow.

He was still dressed in his clothes from last night. She pulled back slightly to see him more fully, and as she did, he stirred, moving his leg over hers as if to keep her closer by his side. She remembered his gentle ministrations, his concern for her, and she knew that everything in this immediate moment felt so right. She also knew where it was possibly wrong, and she didn’t want to take further advantage of his kindness.

She moved to sit up. The shifting in the bed woke him and he opened his eyes.

 _She looks so beautiful_ , he thought, backlit from the sun, her hair mussed, highlights of gold and light brown. Most of her makeup had worn off, but she was even more alluring in her natural state, a sprinkling of freckles on her smooth skin and the natural pink of her lips. Her eyes were greenish-gold in the light, alive and curious.

She moved slightly, self-conscious under his stare. She was wearing one of his T-shirts, and although she was still in her bra and underwear, she realized with a flush of mortification that he must have changed her clothes when she was passed out.

“Morning.”

“Morning.”

They smiled at each other, an awkward silence settling over them, two people who had spent the night together in the most unusual of circumstances.

It was in the silence of that moment that her stomach growled.

Rey flushed, placing her hand over her belly.

"Well, ehrm, I guess I should be heading home now," she stammered as she groaned inwardly. It was a face-palm response if ever there was one.

Kylo's brow lifted. He wasn’t going to let her go that easily. "Stay. I'll make us something to eat and take you home afterwards. You may shower in the meantime, if you'd like."

A shower sounded divine, if only to wash away the stink and residue of her violation from the night before. She picked up her clothes, which were folded neatly on the chair and frowned.

Kylo saw her dilemma. "Feel free to take one of the shirts from my closet. Bathroom is down the hall, second door on your right." He headed out the door to the kitchen to make breakfast.

Rey was thankful. The thought of squeezing herself into a revealing shirt and doing the walk of shame out of his apartment gave her pause.  It was a double whammy, seeing as she didn't even reap the benefits of earning that distinction.

She went over to his closet. It was huge, organized and immaculate. Designer shirts and suits hung neatly in coordinated rows. Tidy shelves were lined with dress shoes and sneakers, categorized by color and purpose. She spied a denim shirt towards the back, softened by age and wear. Perfect. She ran her fingers along the sleeve and brought it close, luxuriating in his essence before heading to the shower

Kylo stood in front of the refrigerator and frowned, wondering why he offered to make breakfast. He was used to eating out or ordering in three times a day. A bachelor’s kitchen, it was fairly empty, aside from two shelves stocked full with various beverages. Several eggs remained and the butter didn’t look overly yellowed. He found the remainder of a loaf of bread which hadn't quite reached its expiration date. He breathed a sigh of relief. Eggs it was. He started scrambling the eggs and put the bread in the toaster when Rey’s cell rang.

And rang. And rang.

Repeatedly.

Irritated by the constant intrusion, he picked it up and looked at the caller ID: _“Finn.”_

By the time Rey finished her shower, Kylo's mood had turned decidedly sour.

He grumbled at her as she sat down. “You had a phone call. Like ten of them.” He felt slightly petulant and small, but he didn’t care.

Rey looked at the long list of calls and texts and gasped.

“I’m sorry, I have to take this,” she apologized, excusing herself as she walked towards the door, dialing Finn’s number.

“Hi, Finn? Yes, it’s me. I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to worry you....No, I'm fine, I’m at a friend’s house. I’ll explain when I get home...Yes, I’ll be home soon..... Love you too.”

Kylo angrily set down the glass of orange juice on the table with a little more force than was necessary when she returned. He took a seat across from her and stared, his broad arms clasped across his chest.

Rey looked up, confused. She couldn’t understand his mercurial mood swings, which alternated from gentle and caring to angry and temperamental. He was confident and competent one minute, and acted like a spoiled child the next. She toyed with her food, suddenly self-conscious and her appetite lessened slightly as he just stared at her, brooding.

Finally, he broke.

“Who’s Finn?” Kylo hated himself for asking.

“What?!”

“Who's Finn?” Kylo gritted out, embarrassed at his need to know.

"Finn’s my roommate," Rey replied, perplexed with his questioning.

“Roommate, as in ‘boyfriend?’”

Rey laughed, “No, he’s a roommate as in ‘roommate.’ I have two of them, you know.”

“Two girls and a guy? Lucky guy.” Kylo smirked, feeling slightly mollified.

“More like ‘lucky girl.’ It’s two guys and a girl,” Rey replied, grinning

Kylo seethed, incredulous.

Rey saw his expression and laughed. "Kylo, I'm just a lowly intern, I can't afford a place on my own. Finn and Poe are my best friends, they have been for years."

He looked slightly sheepish. Deep down, he knew he didn't have a right to be jealous. She was forbidden, denied to him, and he couldn't rightfully stake any claim to her attentions when he was unable to give her his own. He tried to make amends.

"Well, I think they're two very lucky guys," he said by way of apology. He examined her, her slim legs peeking out from underneath the hem of his shirt, her wet hair brushed back. Before he could stop himself, he leaned over and touched the side of her face, subsumed by her lack of artifice and her beauty, his thumb rubbing gently along her cheek.

Rey leaned her head gently into his touch, experiencing a sudden rush of longing and want. She wanted to assuage his jealousy, his insecurity, and she tilted her face to replace her cheek with the softness of her lips against his hand as he groaned with his need for her.

_"Rey."_

He pulled her close and brought his lips to hers. The kiss was warm and soft, without the ferocity but no less needy than the one they shared the night before. He deepened the pressure and she yielded as he reveled in her warmth. She whispered, a languid, breathy sigh of pleasure as she urged him on, her tongue tasting his, a mixture of rough and soft, salt and sweet. He pulled her closer, the feel of his hard chest and arousal evident through the thin layer of her shirt.

He knew it was wrong.  She wanted him, that much was evident.  It would have been so easy to give in to his lust for her and to take her right there.  If it were any other woman, he would probably have done just that, to satiate his own needs. 

  
He pulled away reluctantly.  "Rey, I can't," his voice ragged and broken.  "I don't want to hurt you."

  
She looked at him, her eyes partially clouded with desire, not understanding.

  
"It's--it's Snoke."  His voice trailed as he realized how silly that sounded.

  
Rey frowned.  "Snoke? What does Snoke have to do with anything?"

  
He took her hands in his.  "Rey, I've had issues with my temper in the past. It's not something that I'm particularly proud of.  I've let my anger get the best of me, enough times to the point where I've been written up and have faced disciplinary action for my behavior.

  
"Snoke's always played down these infractions, even getting them removed from my record.  But more recently, it was brought to his attention that we--well, that I was caught in a potentially compromising setting with you.  The night that we worked on the Slip case."

  
_Bazine_ , Rey thought to herself angrily.

  
Kylo continued, the frustration evident in his voice.  "Snoke's forbidden me to have contact with you in any way but of a purely professional nature."

  
Rey looked at him, dumbfounded.  "You're a grown man, Kylo.  How can Snoke stipulate what you do or do not do on your own time? In your personal life?"

  
Kylo sighed. "It's not as simple as that.  Snoke doesn't want to deal with any more potential scandals regarding my behavior.  Arkanis and the neurosurgical department is everything to him. He's dedicated his entire life to it.  He's trained me and positioned me to eventually take over for him in the future.  He refuses to see his hard work destroyed by anyone or anything."

  
Rey reflected on his words.  "But I'll be done with my rotation in another month.  Surely he can't dictate what happens between us after that.  And why wouldn't you consider a position elsewhere if he's so controlling as to make your life miserable?"

  
Kylo shook his head.  "You've seen Snoke. You know how vindictive he can be.  The idea that someone could mean more to me than Arkanis--than my loyalty to him--would be the biggest betrayal in his mind.  Even when your rotation has finished, he would view my personal relationship with you as an act of defiance. 

  
"He is powerful, Rey.  If I tried to leave Arkanis, he could report me to the Office of Professional Medical Conduct. Even though I could probably fight the charge successfully, he would ensure that I could not find a job in any reputable hospital going forward.  He would blacklist me, effectively ruining my career and everything that I've worked for."

  
Kylo hung his head. "Basically, if he can't have me as the next head of Arkanis, no one will."

  
Rey's heart ached for him, for herself, and for the potential of their relationship which could never come to bear.  Now it made sense: Kylo's distant behavior, the changing dynamic of their interactions, his anger.

   
Perhaps she was driven by a need for some semblance of control over her life following the events of the night before.  Rey knew that she wanted Kylo, to be with him intimately in this one instance even if she couldn't have the promise of anything long term.  Emboldened, she leaned closer, giving in to the undercurrent of desire which pulsated between them.

  
"Kylo.  I understand that we can't be together in that way. But I want you, here, today.  Will you at least give that to me?"  She laid her hand on his chest and trailed it down seductively, letting her shirt fall open as she bent forward to expose the swell of her breasts.

Kylo looked at her, as if to ask her of her certainty even as his body pleaded for her consent.  She responded by bringing her lips up to his for a kiss.  He was undone by her boldness, the willingness with which she offered herself to him.

He kissed her back, devouring her, trying to slake his pent up desire.  His teeth grazed her lower lip as he whispered her name.  Suddenly, his hands were everywhere, demanding and crude, kneading her flesh. Her mouth parted and she let out a moan as he moved underneath her shirt, the friction of his palms coarse against her smooth skin.  He deftly undid the buttons, opening them up slowly one by one as he kissed the vulnerable part of her throat, licking and biting, claiming her as his own.  His mouth was hot and wet and she moved closer, needing to feel his flesh against hers.

  
Her chair fell over behind her as he pulled her up against him and into his lap.  Rey wrapped her legs around his waist and quickly pulled off his shirt, greedily feeling the planes of his chest beneath her hands.  The fleshiness of her bottom met the hardness of his cock beneath his jeans, and his large hands gripped her hips, pushing her down as she eagerly ground against him. She let out a moan, feeling the friction of his length and the roughness of the denim against her growing wetness as she increased the speed of her movements.

  
_Fuck_ , he was hard.  He couldn't get enough of her, he needed to see _all_ of her.  Kylo stood, sitting Rey on the counter.  The marble was cold against her hot skin, and she grew restless as she looked down at him, her eyes half-lidded with desire. She was heady at the sight of his evident arousal, its generous outline straining the fabric of his pants.  He slipped her shirt off over her shoulders so only her undergarments remained, her breasts pushing forward against the light restraint of the fabric.

 

Kylo brought his head down, the stubble of his cheek rough against her chest, his hot breath dampening the silk as her nipples hardened underneath. He undid the clasp of her bra and set her free, flicking his tongue against her flesh and taking her in his mouth as she swelled and peaked under his attentions.  Her pupils dilated as she watched him hold her in his hands, suckling her contentedly and then opening wider until she was fully contained within the heat and wetness of his mouth.  She moaned and arched her back, her cheeks flushed, feeling as if she would go mad as she placed her hands on his head, rubbing it in the space between her breasts.

  
She was already wet with her need for him as he slipped her underwear down her legs, opening her up completely to his view.  He knelt in front of her nakedness in supplication as he placed his lips against her, nuzzling her softness, greedily breathing in the scent of her arousal as he held her most private part against his face.  Rey mewled as his tongue began to swirl, licking her folds, increasing in its intensely.  He deepened the pressure, his face bathed in her juices, his tongue probing, pleasuring her wickedly with his mouth as his hands cupped her thighs and spread her apart.

  
"God, you taste so good,"  Kylo murmured, the deep baritone of his voice throbbing against her pussy.  She pressed up against him, growing needy,  briefly expressing her displeasure as he retreated slightly before replacing his tongue with his fingers.  Rey gasped as he slipped them in, increasing their penetration as they became slick with her arousal.  He moved them faster and harder, plunging them deep into her silken walls as he brought his mouth back down, licking and sucking on her clit.

 

Rey watched his dark head moving between her legs and she ground against him, needing to fuck his mouth and his hand.  She started to feel her muscles clench as she chased her release, the walls of her cunt beginning to spasm as he urged her on, the filthy sounds of his slurping vibrating against her pinkened and swollen skin.

  
_"Come for me, Rey."_

  
His fingers moved skillfully and more forcefully as she gripped his shoulders, her nails digging in as her head fell back with the first waves of her orgasm.  She shuddered as she cried out, sobbing his name again and again as he gently eased the pressure from his fingers, letting the waves subside. 

 

Kylo raised himself up slowly, his lips swollen and red, his jaw glistening with her come.  She took his fingers and pressed them along his sodden lips, his eyes widening in pleasure as she brought them slowly into her mouth.  She sucked on his fingers, her tongue traveling along their lengths, applying pressure, moving them in and out, foreshadowing her need to suck somewhere else.

  
Kylo breath hitched and he growled at her wantonness, needing to restrain himself from coming then and there.   His cock strained against his jeans, pulsating with his need. He hastily removed the remainder of his clothing, freeing himself as he lifted her off the counter and into the bedroom.

 

"Your turn," Rey teased as she straddled him, urging him downwards and onto his back, wanting to pleasure him in the same manner as he did to her. His cock was hard against her belly as she moved down the length of his torso, her breasts grazing its leaking head before coming to rest between his thighs.  He gasped as she stroked his shaft, her small hand barely able to contain his size as she placed him in her mouth.

 

Kylo's eyes rolled back and he groaned as her tongue darted out, tentatively at first, licking the glans and the small amount of fluid which had gathered there. Rey gave him a wicked grin as she sucked and tasted and swirled her tongue along his velvety tip, the sloppy sounds of her saliva and her mouth making his breathing ragged.  She moistened her lips and opened wider, relaxing her jaw to take him in further.

 

"Rey," he rasped, absolutely wrecked.  He grabbed her hair to bring her head back slightly, watching as his distended member slid in and out of her mouth, the sight of his flesh moving against her engorged and reddened lips nearly his undoing.  She coordinated her breathing to bring as much of his length to the back of her throat as she could as he bucked forward uncontrollably.   Her hand grabbed the base of his shaft to jerk him off as she sucked, wriggling her hips unconsciously as his scent and movements increased her arousal.

   
_"Fuck, Rey."_   Kylo took her head in his hands to still her, his breathing uneven.  He pulled away from the warmth of her mouth and brought her up, not wanting to come until he could claim her fully.  He captured her mouth, slick with his fluids and smelling of them both.

 

Flipping her over, he positioned himself above her eager body, his quivering prick thick and hard.

 

"Please, Kylo..."  Rey begged, desperate to feel him inside of her. _I need you._   She raised her hips up, grabbing him and placing his tip against her entrance, aching for him to take her.

 

He fought the urge to plunge into her, lowering himself into her slowly instead.  _God, she was perfect,_ he thought. So responsive. So tight and wet.

 

He stilled, allowing her walls to stretch and accommodate his girth.  As he felt her slicken and relax around him, he began to pump rhythmically, gradually deepening his thrusts, sinking in fully.

 

She arched against him as he lowered his head to kiss her, adjusting his position to create more friction against her clit.   Rey matched his movements with her own, urging him to move deeper and harder as she brought her legs up to his shoulders, writhing against him as he buried himself within her repeatedly. The sounds of their moans and the slapping of their bodies filled the space of the apartment as his thrusts became quicker and more erratic.

Rey gripped the sheets beneath her as the heat started to build up inside, spreading along her stomach and thighs to overtake her.  Her pussy began to spasm against the fullness of his cock and she sobbed with pleasure as he let out a guttural noise, the heat pooling in his groin, his balls clenching and tightening, unable to hold back any longer.

Kylo came with a shout, spasming and shuddering, pumping his seed, hot spurts spilling deeply within her as the contraction of the muscles in his lower abdomen and legs left him shaking and weak. Rey joined him, the fluttering in her belly culminating in an explosion of bright lights as all senses concentrated in the space between her legs, muscles tightening, pulling, pushing.  She felt flushed and delirious as the waves of pleasure continued to roll off her again and again.

 

Kylo's movements slowed as he gave in to the ebb and flow of his own release. Dazed, he dropped his head to her shoulder, his come beginning to spill out between her legs as he softened slightly. 

 

"You're so beautiful," he murmured, kissing her gently and nuzzling her neck, sated and spent.  Kylo drew her close to him, encircling her with his arms, her body fitting perfectly in the space between them.

 

Rey tilted her head to look up at him.  She ran her fingers through his hair, brushing his damp locks away from his face.  She traced the length of his nose with her fingers, letting them linger against the softness of his lips. The flush of her skin began to recede and her heart rate slowed as she leaned against him, inhaling deeply. She rested her head against his shoulder, memorizing the pattern of his breathing, his smell, his smile, the weight of his hand as it rested on her back.  

 

The warmth of the noon sun fell over them as Kylo's breathing slowed and settled. Rey watched him wistfully, slightly envious that he could be at such peace. A sudden feeling of sadness welled up inside her which she tried to push aside.

 

 _She had been so wrong_.  She thought that making love to him would fulfill a curiosity, that it would satisfy her need for him. Instead, it opened up an emptiness within her at the thought of being without him.

 

She knew that a relationship with Kylo was a predetermined impossibility. She initiated their intimacy with her eyes wide opened.  She would have to learn to be content with what they had, a memory of their physical and emotional connection.

 

She leaned over and kissed him, willing him to remember as well.


	9. The Unicorn Tapestries

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A confrontation with Hux forces Ren to take a temporary leave of absence from Arkanis, during which he reveals a more personal side of himself to Rey.  
>  
> 
> [excerpt]:  
> Kylo watched her and felt himself relaxing. For the first time in a long while, he felt free--unencumbered by Arkanis, his work, or Snoke and all his restrictions. He decided to lower his defenses and open a part of himself up to her.
> 
> "You'll never guess my favorite place in New York to visit." He stood up, holding out his hand. "Come with me?"
> 
> Rey smiled. "I'd love to."

6:30 PM. Kylo had just finished performing a craniotomy and complex aneurysm clipping and he was exhausted. It wasn't just because of the surgery itself, per se. It was the combination of his work schedule, the daily frustration of dealing with Hux, and the need to clear his thoughts of Rey. He often found himself looking out for her, sneaking furtive glances where he could: in the ICU; on rounds; in the recovery room; in the cafeteria. His mind would replay the events of two weekends ago, and it wasn't infrequently that he found himself becoming aroused at the most inappropriate of times.

All he wanted to do was to run a couple of miles on the treadmill to clear his head before returning to his office to complete his patient charting. The weather was starting to turn brisk, and the orange and red colors of the setting October sun painted the sky above the city . He patted his leather bag to make sure his headphones and workout clothes were in place and headed down the block to the hospital gym.

Upon arriving at the nondescript, utilitarian building, he placed his index finger on the biometric sensor and punched in his access code. He headed down the hallway to the locker rooms, frowning as he opened the door. Nearly all the lockers were occupied, an unusual occurrence at this hour. He spied one towards the back and claimed it, quickly changing into a T-shirt and a pair of shorts before grabbing his headphones and heading out towards the main gymnasium.

Kylo pushed the door open, nearly cursing out loud at the frenzy of activity on the other side. So much for a quiet workout. The room was packed. There was a large class taking place, with what could easily be 30 people. He also spied Hux in the corner, taking up a spot on the line of treadmills near the far wall. He made his way towards the rows of electronic equipment and decided take some pleasure in aggravating Hux as he stepped on the machine next to him.

Hux turned sideways slightly and rolled his eyes as the larger man approached. He was of a slimmer build than Kylo but was lean and sinewy, a runner's body with narrowed hips. Hux kept his face forward, trying to fixate on the console in front of him and switching the interactive course on the screen to reflect the wide open spaces of a Californian National Park, somewhere far away from the man next to him.

Kylo started up his treadmill, gradually increasing the incline and speed as he worked up to a fast jog. He forewent his headphones and heart monitor, keeping his mind focused on the man beside him instead. Although Kylo was tall and the length of his arms and legs appeared almost disproportionate to that of his torso, he was powerful, his long strides and overall movement suggesting an predatory grace.

The two men kept their heads forward but were hyperaware of each other, each increasing the speed and exertion with which they ran, trying to outdo one another. Kylo gave a self-satisfied smirk at the beads of sweat which started to develop on Hux's forehead along with his increased rate of breathing. It was at this point that he allowed himself to turn to the activity in the center of the gym.

Rey stood on the edge of the large mat next to Thomas, James and Bazine, part of the large group participating in the class. The sight of her nearly caused Kylo to break his stride. She was wearing a sports bra which showcased her toned arms and back and flaunted the flatness and definition of her belly. A pair of lycra running shorts hugged a deliciously pert bottom and highlighted her lean legs. He ran a little more forcefully as he was flooded by memories of caressing that ass and having those very legs wrapped around his waist.

Kylo soon forgot about Hux as he focused his attentions on Rey and the rest of her group. Most of the surgical residents were present, as well as staff from the other medical departments. In the center of it all was Phasma, her tall, powerful body towering authoritatively above all others.

 

 

It was exactly seven days ago that Phasma approached Rey regarding the events at Tatooine.

She bent down to give Rey a hug. "Hey, Rey. How are you feeling?"

"OK." Rey gave her a wry smile. "A little embarrassed that I allowed myself to be placed in that situation, but physically I'm fine." She paused, slightly overwhelmed. "I never got a chance to tell you, but thanks for your help that night, Phasma. You and Dr. Ren. I'm so grateful. I don't know how I could ever repay you for all you did."

Phasma scoffed. "What do you mean 'repay?' That's what friends do." Her face took a thoughtful turn as she slowly reconsidered. "On second thought, there _is_ something you could do."

Rey raised her eyebrow in question.

"I want to make sure that you'll always be able to handle yourself in the future if another situation arises. I'd like to get a group together for a Krav Maga self-defense class. Would you come if I set it up?"

"Of course, Phasma!" Rey replied. "I think there would be a lot of people who would want to participate." She bit her lip. "What's Krav Maga, by the way?" She probably should have asked before she agreed to the class. To Rey, it sounded like some kind of exotic delicacy. Knowing Phasma's MMA background, she was envisioning bullet-time fight scenes a la _The Matrix_.

"Krav Maga is a technique developed by Israeli defense forces for use on the streets. I like it because it's instinctual and easy to learn. It's really adaptable to real life situations. You know, like having to deal with all those creepers in the club?"

Once Phasma had Rey's support, she cajoled most of the surgical residents who weren't on call to participate. Arkanis' administration also supported the endeavor, and there was a sizeable representation from the various medical departments as well as the ancillary staff who now stood around her.

 

 

Phasma's commitment was evident as she addressed the class.

"I'm glad to see such a large group here today. Whether you're a man or a woman, you need to learn how to physically protect yourself in case of an assault. Hopefully, you'll be able to increase your awareness of your surroundings and your self-confidence in the process. The things you learn may even save your life.

"Today, we're going to focus on some basic defensive moves. Just know that in Krav Maga, with each defense, you're also going to follow through with an immediate offense."

Some of the residents looked intimidated. Even James, with his slight build and delicate features, shuffled his feet and looked at the mat at the thought of physical contact.

Phasma saw their worried looks. "Look guys, we're not talking about entering a UFC ring here. The techniques I'm going to show you can be used by everyone, no matter your size, strength or fitness level."

She continued, handing out protective headgear and Thai training pads to the class. "Don't worry about any size discrepancies between you and your practice partner. It's good for you to train with people who are physically different from you in order to prepare for real life situations."

Phasma faced everyone, now lined up in front of her. "Starting from the left, I want every other person to turn to the person to your right. You're going to be paired up with them for drills after we learn some basic principles."

Rey turned and groaned. Just her luck.

Bazine looked back at her newly appointed partner and smirked.

Phasma continued. "First things first. Always be aware of your surroundings. Maintain a strong body language. Trust your instincts and call for help if you need to.

"Next, we're going to go over the most vulnerable parts of the body, These are the areas that you should aim for if you're attacked. Rey, can you come up here?"

A couple of the participants laughed. Rey didn't blame them, the top of her head came up to Phasma's collarbone.

Phasma demonstrated on Rey. "If attacked, you want to target soft spots like the eyes, the face, the throat. Their fingers. And my favorite, the groin. Counterattack to try to neutralize your assailant as soon as possible."

Rey bit back a grin as she saw several of the men look slightly uncomfortable, repositioning their bodies as if to protect their private parts.

Phasma next demonstrated the fighting stance followed by the motion of a jab cross. Rey instinctively took a step backwards as she felt a slight whiff as Phasma's fist came close to her face.

"You see how I'm pivoting on my toes and dragging my hip forward into the attack?" Phasma asked. "That's why she's pushing back." After demonstrating the move several more times, she had everyone pair up with their assigned partners in two rows. "Now it's your turn to practice," Phasma instructed.

Rey put on the sparring headgear and velcroed the Thai pads into position. By this point, the sounds of repetitive grunts and audible exhalations, along with the muffled _"pumphhh"_ and _"thwocks"_ of the pads filled the gym. Most of the those invested in their own workouts had now turned to watch the group. Hux, in particular, seemed to have a special interest in watching the activities as he slowed his run into a cool down.

Rey held tightly to the curved pads to protect her upper body as Bazine pushed forward aggressively, hitting against them with more force than necessary. Rey began to back away. The look in Bazine's eyes was furious and belligerent as she kept pressing forward, invading Rey's space almost violently as Rey tried to absorb the blows which were only partially cushioned by the pads on her forearms.

Phasma saw and shouted, "Hey Netal, this is just for drills! I don't want actual contact like that! Take it a couple levels down!"

Despite her deceptively small size, Rey harbored a great speed and flexibility as well as a wiry strength. An anger began to boil up inside of her as she repeatedly blocked Bazine, a reaction to the other woman's flagrant physical aggression towards Rey during the class and her manipulations into Ren's personal life in the past. Rey stripped off the pads and went on the offensive, adopting a fighting stance and closing the distance, pushing off and counterattacking until Bazine had to back away. She felt a fury wash over her, propelling her, pushing her until she was able to grab Bazine's wrist with one hand and bring up her opposing elbow to the side of her senior resident's face. Bazine's eyes widened with fear as Rey set her leg back, coiling as if to bring it up into a kick.

"Nice work, Kenobi." Phasma quickly came from behind to neutralize Rey's arm and leg with her own. "Are you sure you haven't done this before?"

Rey was breathing heavily, restrained by Phasma, the anger starting to dissipate slightly.

"Let's get you with another partner, why don't we?" Phasma said gently, pulling Thomas over and replacing Bazine.

Hux watched their interaction raptly with a sharp intake of breath. _She's magnificent_ , he thought. All that fury and rage. It would be such a delicious challenge to break.

Kylo glanced over to Hux, eyes narrowing. He noticed how intently Hux was focused on the class, a gleam of calculated appreciation in those blue eyes as he watched Rey.

 

**_______________________________________**

 

Kylo followed Hux into the locker room. Hux was standing by his locker, disrobing in preparation to shower when Ren strode in. The younger man was barely able to contain his anger as he shoved Hux against the tiers of metal, the ridges of the doors and raised handle pushing into Hux's back painfully. Ren used the advantage of his height and weight to pin him, his face inches away, furious.

"You dirty little shit! You're going to pay for what you did!"

Hux kept his face schooled, but his eyes were burning furiously. "Why Ren, I have _no_ idea what you're talking about. And please, get your filthy paws off of me."

Kylo backed away slightly but still kept pressure on Hux's shoulder, keeping him boxed in.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about. Slipping Rohypnol into Rey's drink when we were at Tatooine?!"

The door opened as Goddrich stepped in, his mouth making an " _O_ " as he viewed Hux and Ren, two physicians high up on Arkanis' food chain, teeth bared and clashing like a pair of alpha males in the wild. He thought better of it and turned away quickly, shutting the door behind him.

Hux smirked. "As much as I'm flattered by your opinion of me, I had nothing to do with it." His face took on a slightly more lascivious look as he slowly licked his bottom lip, goading Ren. "And trust me, _if_ I ever wanted to fuck Dr. Kenobi, I would want her to remember _everything_ I did to that exquisite body."

Hux didn't have time to see it coming. Ren saw red, his blood boiling and a rushing, deafening roar in his ears. His vision swam, knowing of Hux's sexual proclivities. Uncontrolled, he reared back and swung, hearing the crack as his fist connected with Hux's jaw. Hux's head swung back and hit the locker, splitting his lip.

Hux was furious, a cold, angry glint coming into his eyes as he stepped away, wiping the blood from the corner of his mouth. His lips had already started to swell, along with a hint of bruising blooming on his cheek. Pulling himself up so he almost reached Ren's height, he straightened his hair and addressed him in a deadly tone.

"Well, Ren. I believe that a third degree assault charge can carry a prison sentence of up to a year." He hissed, a real threat under his words. "You're _finished_. Don't you _ever_ think to lay a finger on me again."

Hux walked away angrily as Ren hung his head. _Fuck_. His frustration was not diminished in the least as he felt the crunching of metal giving way to his fist as he took his displeasure out on the next row of lockers.

 

**________________________________________**

 

For the second time in a month, Ren found himself sitting in Snoke's office. The difference this time was that he knew why he was called in.

Snoke stood before him, barely suppressing his rage.

"Kylo Ren. Not only have you destroyed Arkanis Hospital property, but you created a scene heard and witnessed by multiple staff members _and_ you assaulted another employee. Not just any employee. Your co-worker. My other protege."

Snoke continued, anger in his eyes, fury radiating from his tiny body.

"You're lucky that Dr. Hux did not sustain any serious injuries. It was all I could do to convince him not to go to the police. In return, I am giving him priority in the OR for all of his cases. He will also be replacing you as lead researcher in the NFL Concussion Project."

Kylo seethed, but sat stonily. He knew that he was getting off easily given his latest actions.

Snoke circled him slowly and deliberately. Kylo felt a sudden frisson of fear as Snoke paused, standing behind him, placing a bony hand on his shoulder.

"You are on thin ice, Dr. Ren." Snoke returned to face him. "I want you to take the rest of the week off. A personal leave of absence. I am rescheduling all your elective cases during this time period and will assign one of the neurosurgeons from Coruscant as backup coverage for emergencies."

Snoke stood, his voice quiet, but full of promised threat.

"This is your last chance, Dr Ren. Use your time off wisely. Get your priorities straight, rectify your behavior or I will make sure that you 'll never find work in this city again."

 

**________________________________________**

 

Rey was running through Central Park, her Spotify playlist on blast. Even though it was early October, it was sunny and almost 70 degrees, a true Indian summer. Despite the perfect weather, the park was relatively empty. It was 1PM on a Thursday afternoon, in the midst of a regular school and work week. Rey had gotten out early post call and decided it was the perfect day to hit the running track by the reservoir on the north end of the park. As she ran her second lap, she took in the magnificent water views, its mirrored surface reflecting the brilliant colors of the autumn leaves and the surrounding cityscape.

The weather was so beautiful that she decided to head further north after she completed her laps to the wooded area known as The Ravine. She entered through a stone arch, the canopy of oak and hickory trees providing respite from the afternoon sun. An occasional breeze rustled through the leaves, some of them failing in their progressively brittle autumnal holds as they swirled gracefully in flashes of brown and crimson towards the ground. The bubbling sounds of the cascading stream next to the pathway effectively drowned out the city noise, transporting her to a place that should only exist hundreds of miles north of Manhattan.

There were very few people in this area, save for the periodic art student or the couple walking their dog. She decided to head to the grassy banks and the weeping willows of The Pool, one of her favorite resting spots. She was surprised to see that it was already occupied.

Kylo startled at the noise. He had been trying to meditate, attempting to steady his breathing and to let the sounds of the birds and water lull him into a weightless mindfulness when he _felt_ her.

"Of all the gin joints...."

Rey laughed, paraphrasing his unfinished sentiment. "'...in all the towns, in all the world." She paused. "Actually, you're sitting in _my_ 'Café American.' This here is one of my favorite spots to hang in the whole park."

Kylo grinned.

"So, Dr. Ren, what brings you here today?" Rey had heard that he had "taken" several days off. It was the hottest gossip in the hospital following the debacle in the gym, although the details behind it remained a mystery to wagging tongues. The second most speculative event revolved around Hux and the fact that he was currently sporting a shiner of questionable origin on his usually immaculate face.

"Well," he said, somewhat sheepishly. "I'm trying to see how meditation works." He shrugged. "Anger management issues."

"Hmmm," teased Rey. "Interesting. Although I always pegged you as more of a south end of the park, Sheep's Meadow kind of guy."

Kylo clutched a mock dagger to his heart. "The scene to be seen in? You wound me."

Rey laughed.

"Actually, the north end is one of my favorite places," he informed her. "I like the seclusion. It makes me feel like I'm away from all the craziness..." His voice trailed as the words "of the city" were implied, although Rey believed there may have been more that was left unsaid given the brief, wistful expression which crossed his face.

Kylo looked her over. "Just starting your run or finishing?"

"Neither. I'm finished. How was the meditation going before I interrupted you?"

"Hmmmm...I guess I'm finished as well." He sighed. "Actually, I haven't been extremely successful today. I've spent the last day thinking of ways to better myself, so in addition to meditation, I decided to try my hand at cooking. I was tired of ordering in all the time and only having eggs and Ramen in the apartment."

Rey smiled, remembering their breakfast together.

"I read an article in New York Magazine about this bodega in Washington Heights which sells everything from regular groceries to exotic foods, spiritual fixes to herbs." He quickly corrected himself as Rey raised an eyebrow. "Not that kind, at least not that I know of," he laughed.

"Anyway, when I went in, everything looked too esoteric. I couldn't read half the packaging." He shook his head. "The thought of putting it in something that I was going to eat..."

Rey burst out laughing as she imagined him sprinkling the contents of multiple small, questionable packets onto a block of dried noodles.

Kylo watched her and felt himself relaxing. For the first time in a long while, he felt free--unencumbered by Arkanis, his work, or Snoke and all his restrictions. He decided to lower his defenses and open a part of himself up to her.

"You'll never guess my favorite place in New York to visit." He stood up, holding out his hand. "Come with me?"

Rey smiled. "I'd love to."

 

**_________________________________**

 

Kylo had parked his motorcycle at East 90th Street near the Guggenheim. Rey eyed it appreciatively, Even though she had seen him riding it on her first day at Arkanis, it was an intimidating machine, even without its rider.

Kylo watched her appraising it. "It's an MV Agusta F4-CC. 200 horsepower, 1078 cc engine." He looked like a kid showing off his new toy. "I completely indulged myself when I bought it. There were only a hundred of this model ever made." He smiled. "Once in awhile, I get the chance to really open it up and test its capabilities when I take it upstate."

"May I?" Rey asked. As Kylo nodded, she ran her hands along the sleek, carbon fiber body. It was beautiful and sexy, just like it's owner.

Rey had some experience tinkering with go-karts and modified stock cars in her uncle's backyard in California during her youth. Those were nothing compared to this. The foot pegs, hand levers and steering dampers were gorgeous and obviously not mass produced. The titanium racing exhausts and protective mesh shone against the curves of the ebony body. The total package was fast, aggressive, architectural and expensive.

Kylo pulled out a spare helmet which she eagerly took as she climbed on in back of him. The alcantara seat offered little room for a second passenger and forced her to lean heavily into him and hug his waist tightly. He powered the ignition, the instrument panel lighting up with customized graphics. Even at low speeds, she felt as if they were outperforming all the other vehicles as they maneuvered their way through the Manhattan streets, cornering the turns effortlessly. The engine purred, fueled by high octane gas, begging to be ridden hard and fast.

Rey felt the power of the bike vibrating beneath her and saw a mixture of both jealous and appreciative looks from the people on the sidewalks and neighboring cars as they passed. She leaned forward again as they began to pick up speed once they traveled towards the West Side Highway and onto the Henry Hudson Parkway.

They pulled into Fort Tyron Park, set high on a ridge with sweeping views of the Hudson River and the George Washington Bridge in the distance. Kylo led Rey up the hill to a medieval looking structure, its arcaded passageways roofed by Spanish tile bordering an open air courtyard and gardens.

Kylo led Rey in. "This is The Cloisters. It's always been one of my favorite places to visit, even as a child." They walked around the hushed, cool walls, their footsteps and whispers echoing off a mixture of marble, stone and plaster walls . "It was actually recreated from five different Medieval monasteries, all brought over from Europe. It's completely unique in it's architecture, a total mix of geographical origins and styles."

He brought her to Gallery 17, unable to contain his excitement. "Wait until you see this."

Rey gasped. Illuminated in the warm, yellow color of the room was a series of seven tapestries. They were intricate and huge, woven in wool and silk and metallic threads. As glorious as they were, the astonishing detail of the design and the intensity of the restored colors paled in comparison to the subject matter and story which unfolded with each successive piece.

Rey had only seen them in books or movies. They were even more beautiful and moving in person, epic masterpieces of art.

" _The Unicorn Tapestries_ ," said Kylo, a reverent tone in his voice.

Rey looked as the series depicted the mystical and majestic animal as it was being hunted, captured, attacked and brutally killed by a troupe of noblemen. The last tapestry in the series showed the unicorn underneath a tree, chained and enclosed by a wooden fence.

Kylo continued. "There's been some debate as to the actual sequence of the tapestries, but most scholars believe that it ends with this last scene. Christian interpretation sees the unicorn and its death as being symbolic for the Passion of Christ, starting with the preparation of the hunt, leading to the kill and ending with the resurrection. But I happen to like the pagan interpretation, personally."

Rey listened, fascinated.

"Pagan interpretation sees the tapestry cycle as a story of beguiled lovers--the search and eventual capture of a groom by his lady. Do you see this piece?" He pointed to the one in the fifth space which was actually incomplete, mounted and displayed in two torn parts. "This is the only one in the series which is fragmented, damaged beyond repair. It's entitled _The Mystic Capture of the Unicorn._ According to pagan myth, an animal with a single horn can only be tamed by a virgin. Even though the unicorn is ambushed and attacked by the hunters in the previous panels, it's still able to escape. Once it meets the maiden, however, it's subdued and then killed while under her charm.

"The very last tapestry, _The Unicorn in Captivity_ , is probably the most famous of the entire series. Here, the unicorn can be seen to represent Christ or the tamed lover, depending on your interpretation."

Rey looked closely. The unicorn sat amid a riotous background of plants and flowers. It looked calm despite being captured and chained. The expression it wore was neither resigned nor scared, but rather one of acceptance and peace.

Kylo gestured to the artwork in front of them.  "The fence is so low that the unicorn could jump and escape if it wanted. It looks to be wounded, but the red on its neck and flank is not blood, it's actually drops of pomegranate juice from the fruit above. It's amazing, isn't it, that after it's betrayal and death, it doesn't seem angry. There's no distress, no fear."

Kylo seemed lost in his thoughts, a far-away look in his eyes. "These tapestries are one of the reasons why I became so fascinated with neurobehavior and the role of the amygdala in the first place."

Rey watched him closely. This was the first time he was actually speaking about his most personal project with her, a project he had desperately wanted her to be a part of.

"You know that the amygdala is part of our limbic system. It's involved in our emotional reactions, our decision making processes. It plays a large role in our memories and our fears."

He continued, impassioned. "Fear is actually a process of our conscious _minds_ , whereas emotions are products of our conscious _experiences_. Just like the unicorn, we can't change the events of our past experiences. But we may be able to control our reactions to them, by regulating our responses or perhaps even modulating the fear circuit itself."

His voice softened. "Imagine being able to control the triggers so we may be free of fear and the pain it creates in our lives."

Rey saw how personal the subject was for him. There must have been something in his past which kept the issue in the forefront of his consciousness. She wanted to hold him, to reach out to the sensitive boy who was consumed with the question of fear half a lifetime ago as well as the man who, despite all his incredible achievements, was still looking for the answer.

A bell chimed, warning of 30 minutes until the museum's closing. They walked out together into the courtyard, As they stepped out into Bonnefont garden, he placed his arm around her, a natural movement that drew her closer. The air was filled with the smells of plants and herbs, turning slightly brisk as the sun slowly lowered itself in the horizon. Kylo pulled a sweatshirt out of his bag, placing it on Rey.

She smiled her thanks. "At this rate, I'll have half your closet by the end of the year," she teased.

She regretted it as soon as the words were out of her mouth. Those words implied a future with him, an accumulation of things and memories which were not in their plans.

Kylo smiled. "It looks better on you anyway." He looked at her as they stood under a quince tree ripe with fruit, he in the shade while the late afternoon sun bathed her features in its fading glow. He couldn't resist, bringing his head down and gently kissing her on the mouth, full of love and want, lips pressuring hers softly while his tongue probed gently.

She wanted to return his kiss, but couldn't. She held him back slightly, looking up and hoping for the response she desired in her heart as she asked.

"Kylo. Has anything changed with Snoke?"

His eyes were too honest. Even though he didn't reply verbally, she knew the answer right away. It was fifteen years since Snoke began his interference and manipulations into Kylo's life, and nothing had changed.

She pulled back. It wasn't that she was a prude. She wished she could just indulge her carnal desires and be satisfied with mind blowing sex. But this _hurt_.

"I'm sorry," she said, longing and heartache in her voice. " The thought of being with you like this, and not being able to have anything more...."

Kylo didn't even attempt to fight her or convince her otherwise. He understood, even as he felt an overwhelming sadness and regret.

"I'm sorry Rey." He gave her a kiss on top of her head as the sun dipped down below the hill, leaving her cold. "Come, I'll take you home."

They gathered their things and climbed back on the bike. She leaned forward into him again, fighting back her tears and the keening sense of loss as they began to pick up speed. When he dropped her off in front of her apartment, he touched her face gently without removing his mask. She thanked him for the day and said goodbye, turning around and refusing to look back as she heard him pull away, the sound of the bike diminishing in the distance as he disappeared into the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :  
> Thanks so much to reyxxkylo for the fantastic gym prompt and to shortysc22 and randombitsofstars for their help in developing the reveal of the culprit behind Rey's spiked drink!


	10. Revelation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux has always prided himself as being an astute observer of human character.  
> *explicit scene, including implications of prior dubious consent. If this bothers you, skip to the break and then to the very end for the reveal. NOT underage. Updated tags and warnings have been added.
> 
> [excerpt]:  
> Hux liked his partners to be flawless on the outside, albeit marked by him on the inside. He felt a thrum of power as his lover's mouth was agape, face flushed, lips bruised, panting, his initial misgivings and embarrassment regarding their pairing giving way to his desire and need.  
> 

Hux leaned back against the sheets, smoke curling from the cigarette dangling delicately between his fingers as he flicked the ashes into the tray at the bedside. Smoking was not something he did frequently, but he did allow himself the indulgence once in awhile. There were other, more pleasurable ways to take the edge off.

All in all, it had been a wonderful day. Ren had returned from his leave of absence, chastened and quiet, although Hux could feel him bristling and seething beneath the more docile exterior. Ren's discomfiture made dealing with him much more delicious, and Hux reveled in needling him more than necessary during their interactions.

Things were also looking up professionally. The NFL and the players' union had been pleased with Arkanis' progress on the concussion project. Hux knew that most of the initial groundwork and study design had been laid out previously by Ren, who was initially designated as the lead investigator of the group. It had also grown into a large, multi-center study involving many of the top academic hospitals in the country, thanks to Snoke's wide-reaching influence. Hux's role had primarily been to collect and analyze all the incoming data, looking for patterns that would support a conclusion. In truth, he was very good at it. Although it wasn't flashy, it was a lot of work, and he had always felt that he deserved to be at least co-lead investigator with Ren given the depth of his role. Now that Ren's debacle caused him to lose the coveted solo spot of his own doing, who was Hux to complain?

Yes, it was definitely a good day. Hux's lips curled slowly into a smile as he took another drag.

He gave a contented sigh as he looked down at his lover, who was lying naked between his thighs, slim fingers making quick work of his trousers. Perhaps "lover" was a bit too generous, a little too soon given that they had only been together for a week. But Hux had not doubt that, with a little more time, he would soon fulfill _all_ the intimacies of the term.

He closed his eyes and felt his cock stir as tentative hands gently brushed up and down his shaft, their pressure and speed increasing ever so slightly before lingering over the glans, squeezing the velvety tip. _Mmmmm._ Hux was happy that the young man was a quick learner. He grew harder and bit back a moan as the fingers were replaced by a mouth, sucking, sloppy and wet.

He looked down at the blonde head which had started to bob up and down on his cock. His technique had certainly improved, but that's because Hux had patience and had taken the time to educate him, teaching him exactly how he liked it. In the beginning, the boy had been uncertain and inexperienced, going down on him too far and gagging and drooling or slipping with the occasional grazing of teeth. Hux had to admit, however, that the sudden surprise of pain which accompanied those slips were occasionally pleasurable once it was followed by the caress of a soft tongue and the apologies of a warm, wet mouth and he forgave him.

For now.

He felt that mouth and those beautiful, soft lips lower themselves to suck his balls, tonguing his sac and rolling the weight of them in his mouth as fingers caressed and massaged the skin underneath. The warmth and moisture of his lover's breath mixed with the coolness of the air, making his skin sensitive with need. Hux felt the roughness of a tongue as it lapped the underside of his shaft, leaving a trail slicked with spit before lips wrapped themselves completely around his prick once again.

He put the cigarette out and placed his hands in his lover's hair, pressing down, guiding him deeper onto his cock, now swollen, weighty and thick. He heard the noisy slurp of saliva mixed with his precome as his shaft slid in and out, slicked with juices, almost retracting completely before being engulfed again. The tongue swirled as it sucked on Hux's fluids, likely tasting of salt, mixed with his scent.

Hux gave a slight groan as he gazed down and saw a pair of warm brown eyes which looked back up at him, craving his approval. They were shiny, their sheen hinting at unshed tears. It could have been a result of the pain from taking so much of Hux's thick cock into the back of his throat, or it could have been from the shame at the situation he found himself in. Hux knew he didn't very much care what the cause was.  Either one sufficed to increase his own sense of domination and arousal.

The young man lowered his eyes and focused back on the task at hand. At times, he looked like he was barely out of high school although he was 25, only 7 years younger than Hux. His lack of experience with men and with sexual acts in general made him a relatively clean slate, someone malleable to Hux's whims.

Hux nodded slightly, letting the boy know that he was doing a satisfactory job. He was miserly with compliments in general. _Always leave them wanting more_ , that was his motto. It was important that he remained in charge, praising infrequently in order to keep his lovers needy and only when it served his purpose.

By now, the younger man had his mouth stuffed with cock, suppressing a gag as Hux began to pump deeper, moving his hips forward, grabbing his head and tilting it back slightly so could continue to gaze on _that face_. He could see that the boy's cock stirring and getting hard as he let out a moan, the throaty sound vibrating around his shaft.

 _Interesting_. One week ago, the young man was a reluctant partner, only showing signs of arousal despite himself when Hux skillfully pleasured him with his mouth. Now he was showing signs of eagerness just by blowing Hux. The realization turned on Hux immensely. He sat up, pulling the blonde with him, feeling his partner's prick harden further as it rubbed against his own cock, the young man's hips grinding ever so slightly as he straddled Hux, increasing pressure and seeking friction for them both.

Hux ran his fingers down the young man's face, almost tenderly before bringing his lips down possessively, grinding and taking control. The kiss was hard, Hux's fingers pressing on the angle of his lover's lower jaw to make him open up further as he increased the depth and cadence of their kiss, his tongue thrusting and demanding, tasting him. He removed his mouth to make his way to his lover's neck, nipping, biting and sucking but always stopping short of leaving a mark. Hux liked his partners to be flawless on the outside, albeit marked by him on the inside. He felt a thrum of power as his lover's mouth was agape, face flushed, lips bruised, panting, his initial misgivings and embarrassment regarding their pairing giving way to his desire and need.

The younger man arched back as his hips jutted forward with his arousal, becoming insatiable in his want. Hux had been extremely patient, but now the time finally seemed right for the final step. He held the young man close with one arm, chests and hips pressed together while he reached around with the other and started to tease the boy's puckered entrance, applying pressure with his forefinger as the other male startled slightly before relaxing into his hand. Hux rubbed gently but insistently, content to just play with the rim without penetrating as the man almost whined in need, his hole twitching, begging for something more.

_"Please..."_

Hux brought his fingers to his partner's mouth, fitting the first and then the second as his lover sucked on them eagerly, laving and moistening them with his spit. Hux brought his slicked hand back down, stopping to mix it with the juice which had started to leak on both of their cocks, before returning his dripping fingers to his lover's entrance, a virgin hole opening up for the first time for him and him alone.

He worked the hole gently, pushing one finger into its velvety warmth, probing deeper as his lover adjusted to the foreign pressure. When he felt him relax he slowly added another and then a third, working them back and forth, feeling the smooth walls stretch and relax even further to the intrusion. His lover let out another moan and began to roll his hips, arching and pushing his bottom further against Hux's hand as Hux finger fucked his ass. Hux held down the slim hips in front of him which began to buck eagerly as the young man tried to sink in further in the back while grinding against Hux's erection in the front, his engorged cock red and leaking with his need.  Hux growled, increasing the speed and depth of his penetration.

The younger man panted.  _"Please, Hux. I need...."_

Hux had taught the young man early on that he was not allowed to touch himself and seek his own pleasure unless Hux gave him his consent. Hux knew the boy was on fire, aching, his dick throbbing, made worse by his inability to touch.  So far, he was behaving beautifully, so submissive and pliant, and Hux felt the heat unfurl in his groin, his own cock rock hard.

Hux looked into his lover's eyes. He had a beautiful face, almost too pretty. Long lashes and full lips, delicate cheekbones and a lean, clean-shaven body. But it was those warm brown eyes, so expressive and guileless, that were his own downfall.

 

 

When Hux had heard that someone had slipped a roofie in Rey's drink, he had his own suspicions as to who it could be. He paid close attention to those around her, monitoring their body positions, their mannerisms, any change in behavior during their interactions with her. Hux had watched the boy's eyes as they followed Rey during rounds, stealing lovelorn glances during lectures, following her like a puppy dog longing for a pat on the head. Hux watched in the gym, during the self-defense class, as the boy turned his head during the discussions of sexual assault, his face flushed with guilt, unable to meet Phasma or Rey's gaze.

Unlike Ren, who jumped to erroneous conclusions based on his emotions, Hux was methodical, always meticulous, doing his due diligence. He discovered the combination to the young man's locker, rifling through his backpack, finding those telltale gray-green pills still encased in their blister packets. He confronted him with the find, threatening to go to the OPMC and the police. The poor boy broke down, crying and confessing everything immediately, beseeching Hux not to go to the authorities, and _'Wasn't there anything he could do to change his mind?'_ This boy, who had been a good boy up until then, from a well-to-do and prominent family, practically on his knees, begging.

It was almost too easy. Hux generally liked a challenge to keep himself interested, but the boy was so beautiful and broken, and was becoming so responsive and willing a lover that he overlooked it.  Perhaps he could always introduce Bazine into the mix if things started to get dull.

 

 

  

The boy's eyes were now dilated with arousal as Hux turned him around and bent him across the bed, squeezing and separating his ass cheeks. He grabbed the bottle of lubricant from his nightstand and slicked his member, turned on by the obscene sound of his hand mixing with the moistness of the juices from his lover's ass.

Hux was huge and throbbing, unable to believe it had only taken a week to get to this stage. Not only was he about to take his lover's virgin ass, the boy was now taking his hands and shamelessly spreading himself apart for him like a whore, wanton in his need to be fucked.

Hux's lust grew as he pressed into his lover's entrance, stilling temporarily at the sharp intake of the younger man's breath. He knew he couldn't be patient much longer. The pressure was building up in his groin as he began to push in further, grinding up against him, balls slapping, pumping against the flesh of his ass.

Hux was overcome with power as his lover began to meet his thrusts eagerly with a backwards motion of his own, trying to encourage him to go deeper, to stimulate that area inside him that he knew would give what he craved but couldn't reach yet. It was an overwhelming feeling of want, as he was begging for release.

Hux felt benevolent as he reached forward and began pumping his lover's shaft, each stroke matching his thrusts, the sweat, scent, lubrication mingling into one, becoming slick as he felt his cock harden even further as he allowed himself to rut uncontrollably, driving deeper until he burst, spurting shot after shot into the tightness.  At the same time, he felt his lover's cock stiffen, the blonde crying out as he erupted, sticky wetness coating Hux's hand.

Hux held onto his lover's hips, the younger male's legs almost buckling from his orgasm, his ass fucked raw. Hux, ever the experienced lover, gently trailed kisses along his neck and upper back, temporarily easing his pain. Lest he feel too much comfort, he also brought up his hand, filled with come, to his lover's lips, forcing him to lick up his own spend as he whispered in his ear.

_"You're such a good boy, James."_


	11. Last Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey says her goodbyes as her rotation at Arkanis comes to an end.  
>   
> [excerpt]:  
> Snoke watched from the end of the hallway as Rey exited Kylo's office, her visit lasting less than 5 minutes. Her ID was turned in, her biometric imprint no longer in Arkanis' systems. He observed Kylo as he let her out, a defeated set to his shoulders.
> 
> He couldn't have been more pleased with how things had unfolded.
> 
> Snoke retreated back to the quiet of his office, hands brought thoughtfully to his face as he reclined in his leather chair and watched the sun set over the Manhattan skyline.

The November air had a sharp bite as Rey stepped out of the subway station on Lexington and 33rd for the last time. She pulled her coat closer as she negotiated her way through the traffic of commuters rushing to catch their trains or hail a cab. The wind tended to whip through the corridor of tall buildings in mid-town, making it feel colder and more raw than the 45 degrees reported by the weatherman on the news that morning. Most people had a determined look on their faces as they tried to reach their destinations in the shortest time possible, the crowd on the sidewalks pushing and lurching forward en masse.

Rey thawed out somewhat as she entered the warmth of Arkanis' lobby, nodding at the girl who sat at the front desk of the lobby.

The receptionist's blue eyes brightened as she returned Rey's smile.

"Good morning, doctor."

"Good morning," Rey waved cheerfully before heading to the second floor locker room and changing into her scrubs.

Rey joined the rest of her team for sign outs in the cafeteria, feeling slightly nostalgic. She was going to miss this--her new friends, their easygoing rapport, the comfort of their morning routine.

"Can you believe it's the last day already?" Phasma asked. "Where are you rotating next?"

"I'm headed back to Republic, on their trauma service. How about you?"

"I'm heading over to the VA and then I'm back here in January." Phasma finished her protein shake. "Do you think you'll be back?"

Rey considered. Her residency training program did not offer many rotations at Arkanis, although there were always opportunities for a surgical subspecialty elective in her last two years.

"Perhaps. Maybe I'll sign up for a month of orthopedics." She grinned, and then her voice softened. "I'd love to work with you again, Phasma."

"Well, no matter what, you have to stay in touch." Phasma insisted, persuasive as ever. "I believe we still have a girl's night out to make up for. You have my number."

The group headed up to the ICU to round with Simon for the last time. Rey thought about how lucky Arkanis was to have a physician like Simon. He had been a smart, wonderful and thoughtful chief who cared for his patients and took interest in the well being of his residents. It was a given that the powers that be would want him to continue as an Attending Physician in Surgery at Arkanis once his residency training was complete.

Rey finished her morning work before scrubbing into a colon resection with Dr. Stanley. She completed her off-service notes later in the afternoon before saying her goodbyes, starting with the ICU and OR nurses and technicians. She headed to the resident's locker room to gather her things for the last time before signing out.

Phasma and Thomas were signing out their patient information to James, who was the unlucky person to draw the short straw for call. Rey hugged Thomas and James goodbye, giving James a slightly inquisitive look as he hung back slightly from their physical contact. She gave the biggest hug to Phasma who reiterated her demand for a night out, before heading to the office to hand in her cell.

Rey knocked on the door to capture Maz's attention as she went in.

"Hi, Maz." She smiled as she held out her cell and Arkanis ID. "Thanks for everything."

"You're welcome, Rey." Maz signed her paperwork and entered Rey's information into the computer system before returning her gaze.

Maz's large eyes were warm. "I do hope we will see you again, Dr. Kenobi."

"Me too, Maz," said Rey. "I really enjoyed my rotation here. I can't believe it's over already!"

"Sometimes what seems like the end is just the beginning, Dr. Kenobi," Maz said cryptically.

She observed Rey closely. "Have you said your goodbyes to everyone?" She glanced down the hallway in the direction of Kylo's office.

Rey hesitated but knew she couldn't leave without seeing him one more time.

"If Dr. Ren is not with patients, may I go in?"

Maz checked his scheduled. "He doesn't have outpatient hours this afternoon. I believe he's in there now." She patted Rey's hand, with a slight squeeze of encouragement.

"Take care, Dr. Kenobi."

**__________________________________**

 

Rey knocked on Kylo's door, letting her hand linger on the warm wood before dropping her hand to her side. She hadn't seen much of him since their impromptu date in Central Park, at least not in person.

The space he occupied in her mind was an entirely different matter.

He came to the doorway, running his hand though his glorious hair, his face breaking out into a smile. It was genuine, albeit with a touch of sadness.  He knew why she had stopped by.

"Hi Rey," he said, a quiet tempering the deep timbre in his voice. "Come in." He shut the door behind them as she entered, giving them the illusion of privacy.

She had dreaded this day more than any other in the last 2 months. The final goodbye.

"Hi, Kylo." She hesitated, the words tripping over themselves before they could come out clearly, sounding meaningless and trite and in no way reflective of what she was truly feeling.

"Today's my last day at Arkanis. I--I just wanted to say goodbye. To thank you for everything that you've done, everything that you've taught me.  I won't forget it."

The words were inadequate. What she really wanted to say was, _"I won't forget you.  I won't forget how sweet and protective and infuriating you can be.  I won't forget your smile, your sadness, the feel of your mouth on mine.  I won't forget how you make me feel strong and sexy and beautiful._

_"I won't forget how you made me fall in love with you."_

He slowly bridged the distance between them. She felt his power as he stood next to her, the heat thrumming from his body.

"I'll never forget either, Rey." He understood everything that was left unsaid.  He tilted her face slightly as he gave her a gentle kiss on the cheek, outwardly chaste. Only the slight increased rate of his breathing and darkening of his pupils let her know how difficult it was for him to restrain himself from doing anything more.

She felt her heart race as she looked into his eyes, her breath constricting, daring him with her gaze to prove it to be so.

He kissed her on the mouth softly, gently, letting her know how much she meant to him in that single breath. His lips pressed against hers, inhaling her scent, feeling the softness of her face against his roughness, her light against the turmoil in his heart, wanting to remember this moment.  He imprinted it on his memory, to have this one thing as his own, forever.

He pulled back reluctantly, looking deeply into her eyes. Memorizing her, tucking the mental photograph away in his heart.

"Bye, Rey."

**_______________________________________**

 

Snoke watched from the end of the hallway as Rey exited Kylo's office, her visit lasting less than 5 minutes. Her ID was turned in, her biometric imprint no longer in Arkanis' systems. He observed Kylo as he let her out, a defeated set to his shoulders.

He couldn't have been more pleased with how things had unfolded.

Snoke retreated back to the quiet of his office, hands brought thoughtfully to his face as he reclined in his leather chair and watched the sun set over the Manhattan skyline.

 

It was a little over 40 years ago that Snoke found himself in a similar position as Ren professionally. He had just completed his residency and was quickly rising up the ranks of Arkanis' ladder. His skills and knowledge as well as his politicking gave him an advantage over others. His ability to read people and manipulate them for his own means was quite another.

Within the next 10 years, Snoke had become the head of Arkanis' neurosurgery department. His ability to recruit top talent to the program as well as to fundraise for the department also bought him a seat on Arkanis' medical board. It was there where he met Anakin Skywalker, one of Arkanis' founders and one of the most powerful people in New York.

Anakin, like Snoke, was dedicated to Arkanis, his life consumed by his work. He had come from extreme poverty, but through hard work, shrewdness and some luck, had risen to the top of the health care system.

Snoke discovered that Anakin was long widowed but had two children, twins named Luke and Leia, who were themselves physicians. His progeny had proved to be great disappointments to Skywalker. Both were exceptional physicians of great skill, but they shunned what their father had built, opting out of the high paying and glamorous life of becoming leaders in one of the country's top hospitals to work for more 'noble' causes. The son had gone abroad for the purpose of teaching medicine in underserved communities while the daughter was involved in charitable work through Doctors without Borders. Insult was added to injury when she married someone completely outside of the medical profession: Han, a pilot who flew runs for DWB, bringing in needed medications, equipment, physicians and the occasional patient.

It was ironic that Anakin, who fought so hard to escape his humble beginnings, ended up siring children who shunned the wealth and power he worked so long for.

Snoke understood Anakin and in some ways became a surrogate son. Together, they continued to build Arkanis' empire by increasing their exposure through their connections and the press, collecting the top medical minds from around the country, and creating a behemoth and world wide fame in the process.

Things changed, however, when Leia had a son. Not just any son. Kylo, birth name Ben Organa-Solo. He was a boy who was evidently special and talented, smart and insightful beyond his years. Snoke watched from the background as Anakin began to be drawn back into his family's life following Ben's birth. Leia even moved back to the city in an effort to repair the family dynamic, although she opted to work at Coruscant, unable to come to terms with working at Arkanis and everything that it represented.

The old man became a doddering fool, foresaking Arkanis and Snoke when he returned to his family. Anakin was entranced by Ben, a precocious child with a sharp mind and an advanced verbal acumen, who doted on his grandfather the way Anakin wished his own children had. The two were inseparable; Anakin continued to encourage Ben's thirst for knowledge while exposing him to all the culture Manhattan had to offer and the endless resources at his disposal.

Anakin died when Ben was just 7, a second grader who was too young to comprehend the meaning of death but old enough to feel the loss keenly. Anakin had left him a sizeable inheritance, to be transferred to Ben when he turned 21. He also set up a trust fund under the care of Ben's parents to cover the cost of his education at the finest private schools in the city.

Ben's parents were responsible trustees, refusing to let him access his wealth outside of his trust until he was old enough to learn the benefits of hard work and to be grateful for what he had. It was difficult, however, when Ben entered middle school. Those could be cruel years in general, which were made worse in the setting of a rich and privileged Upper East Side private school where the other kids had so much and Ben had relatively less. It also didn't help that Ben was an awkward teen, taller than his classmates with proportions that were slightly off. His physique, the set of his ears, the wideness of his mouth, and his expressive eyes made him the target of much ridicule. He was also exceedingly bright and was advanced a couple of grades ahead of his peers, a teacher's pet whose academic prowess did not align with his social and emotional immaturity.

Ben's achievements in the study of neurobehavioral sciences soon made the local papers. The national news and media quickly followed. By this time, Snoke had become the most powerful member of Arkanis' impressive staff. He slowly insinuated himself into Ben's life, introducing himself as an old friend of his grandfather's. Leia and Han were apprehensive, but they saw the loneliness in Ben, and Snoke gave him a sense of connection to Anakin in addition to support for Ben's talents.

Snoke not only saw this as a great opportunity to grow and cultivate a shining star, but to exact a delicious form of revenge on the Skywalker family. Where Anakin had groomed Snoke for Arkanis' future but abandoned him to return to his family, Snoke could now take the thing that turned Anakin, bringing him back into Arkanis' fold. Following Ben's win at the Intel Science Competition for his work on the amygala and PTSD, Snoke used his media and medical connections to further strengthen Ben's connection to Arkanis and himself.

As Ben became a senior in high school, he grew out of those awkward teen years and into a beautiful young man, his physical appearance finally catching up to his intellect. It was a heady combination to his peers, their snobbery in the past years forgotten for a boy who was now a media darling and becoming a fixture on the social circuit as well. He no longer lacked for companionship, especially of the female persuasion, and with Snoke's continued promises of a better life, Ben became more isolated from his family. His father in particular did not like how Ben's life was changing, and he and Leia continued to withhold his monies, which only served to increase Ben's resentment of them.

When Ben turned 18, he filed for emancipation from Leia and Han with Snoke's help. He legally changed his name to "Kylo Ren" as a further act of distancing himself from his family, using a portion of his inheritance to purchase a loft in Tribeca as his new residence. Kylo subsequently attended a top American university, medical school, and residency program in quick succession, all leading to a position within Arkanis' neurosurgery department by Snoke's side. As a congratulatory gift to himself he had purchased a $120,000 motorcycle, cementing the extravagant lifestyle that Snoke encouraged and which was so contrary to the values that Kylo's family had tried to instill in him.

Han and Leia still tried to contact him occasionally in an effort to reconnect, but those times became fewer and far between as Kylo repeatedly spurned their efforts. He sought the company of numerous women, but never made any significant emotional attachments. Deep down he remained lonely, the only thing giving him a sense of drive and fulfillment being his professional success.

That and Snoke.

In fact, when Hux approached him about Kylo's interest in Rey, there was an ulterior motive to Snoke's ultimatum. Snoke never had issues with all the women Ren had dalliances with--in his mind, the more, the better. Whether the woman was an actress, a model, a barista in a coffee shop or a first year surgical resident, it made little difference to Snoke. With the increased number of affairs came the dwindling chance that Ren would form a significant emotional attachment to any one particular person.

Snoke didn't want to lower himself into meddling in Ren's romantic flings, so normal for men of Kylo's age and stature. In fact, he also knew of Hux's questionable sexual exploits and chose to look the other way. Ren's interest in Rey, however, set off warning bells in Snoke's head. There was something about the way Ren talked about her, the way he looked after her, that signaled more than a passing interest.

Snoke didn't get where he was without being able to read people well, being the greatest schemer and manipulator of them all. He saw Rey as a threat to his hold on Kylo and Kylo's dedication to Arkanis.  She was a slip of a girl who had the potential of undoing over 15 years of Snoke's work, both in front of and behind the scenes.  He needed Kylo to remain as he was: malleable, with the fear of being alone and left with nothing.

Now that Rey was out of Arkanis and his life, Kylo was lonelier than ever, having experienced and lost what was possibly his first true love.

 _Good riddance,_ Snoke thought, a gleeful expression on his face as the sky turned dark.

 

**_______________________________**

 

Rey sat in the residents' lounge with Poe, draping her legs with a casual familiarity over his lap.  It was a Sunday call and things had been relatively quiet for the two of them.  So far, only minor trauma cases had come in through the emergency department: a slip and fall with a brief loss of consciousness and a brawl from an extended night out with facial fractures to show for it.  None of the cases required OR time with the general surgical team. 

She bit into her sandwich and turned back to the television.  Bored with the limited choice of children's cartoons and football, they decided to Facetime Finn. 

Finn was out, heading towards The Museum of Natural History. It was the day before Thanksgiving and the city was filled with visitors who were visiting for the holiday.  The energy from the streets was infectious, and Finn brimmed with child-like enthusiasm. 

"I'm so going to do the touristy thing today.  I'm heading over to watch them inflate the Thanksgiving Parade balloons." Finn was practically jumping up and down.

Rey and Poe made a face simultaneously.

Poe looked like he just ate something distasteful.  "Seriously, Finn?  You're going to brave all the crazy crowds and the cold just to see some things fill up with hot air?"

Rey decide to join in the good-natured ribbing. "I mean, you can just talk to your boyfriend here for another hour if that's what you're looking for!"

Poe pushed her, laughing as Finn smiled into the phone. "Sorry Poe.  As much as I love you, you know my heart will always belong to Spongebob!"

"Would have thought it was Spidey.  I mean, the costume and all,"  Poe countered.

Rey guffawed. "No, Hello Kitty, riding her little yellow airplane."  She knew Finn had a thing for pilots.

Finn stared back at them.  "Well, you guys are ones to talk.  You're sitting in the hospital eating cafeteria food, sucking in stale air and making fun of me while I'm out enjoying myself with the rest of the world. Anyway I'm going to grab some good street food and head on over.  See ya later!"

Rey grinned as they said good bye, returning to the lackluster options of Sunday afternoon cartoons playing on the television

 

**_____________________________________**

 

The autumnal scenery on the New York Thruway was becoming a thing of the past, the last remainders of its foliage dirtying the side of the roadway as the trees prepared to embrace the upcoming winter season.

Kylo was driving his motorcycle fast, hitting as close to 80-90 mph as he could without getting pulled over. He had left for the trip upstate to clear his head, going as far as Rhinebeck. Typically, a stop at this quaint town with its majestic views of the Catskills and the Hudson served to clear his head and the claustrophobia of the city. Instead, he couldn't escape thoughts of her. He drove down the narrowed streets, watching couples hold hands as they went antiquing, shopped in crowded boutiques, or lunched in cafes. All he could think about was how Rey's face would delight in looking at little chotchkies; how she would twirl as she modeled a new dress for his pleasure; how her lips would curl around a morsel of food as she tried a delicacy for the first time.

How her body would be entwined in his as they spent an intimate night together at a bed and breakfast.

The trip only served to make him feel lonelier and he decided to head home. It was only when he was flying on the road, his mind focused on controlling the bike's raw power that he was able to temporarily let go of the thoughts plaguing him. The engine sung at high speeds, outperforming all other vehicles around him. It managed the hills and curves of the Taconic, turning crisply on the bendy roadways, the acceleration strong and thick. He let himself become one with the machine, it's delivery of power strong and smooth.  He felt the punch of the engine as it revved up and pushed itself to higher velocities. accompanied by the guttural notes being emitted from the titanium exhaust.

He loved his bike. Contrary to what many thought, he didn't just buy it just to acquire something exotic, or to be flashy. The bike was an extension of himself.  It made him feel free.

But now, even it felt insufficient.

Once he entered the city and hit the West Side highway, it was as if the trip upstate never happened. He was back in the midst of the din, the crowds, the gridlock, on a 420 pound racing machine forced to sit at a standstill.

Kylo groaned inwardly. He forgot about the Thanksgiving Parade preparations, and now he was stuck on this route for the next 20 blocks. It was made worse by the maddening crowds who were in town for the holiday weekend, forcing him to slow even further. The sidewalks were filled with families, weekend visitors and tourists while the streets were congested with out of town vehicles and aggressive cabbies angling for their fares.

As he stopped at a light surrounded by cabs, he felt a slight pang of longing as he watched families with their kids in tow. It was something he vaguely remembered in his distant past, and something he didn't foresee in his future. Instead, he was left with Arkanis and the legacy of his work, something which seemed fulfilling enough just two months ago, but which now seemed woefully inadequate.

He sighed internally as he watched a young boy and his mother make their way towards The Museum of Natural History. The child grew visibly more animated as he saw the flashes of colors from the balloons peeking in between the buildings and above the trees. The child tugged on his mother's arm in excitement, pulling her ahead. Kylo looked ahead as the light for the cross traffic turned yellow, and prepared to go.

He frowned as he eyed the cab to his left. The driver seemed to be arguing with his passenger and was not paying attention to the surroundings. He tried to wave to get catch the driver's eye. As the light turned green, the child broke free, running across the pedestrian walkway against traffic as the cars surged forward.

 

**____________________________**

 

 _**"Trauma team, tier one**_ _**to the emergency room.  Trauma team, tier one to the emergency room."** _

Rey startled as her beeper went off at the same time the announcement was made over the PA system.  She felt slightly stiff as she disentangled herself from the couch, falling over Poe in the process. 

"Guess my break's over," she grinned at Poe.

"See ya later. Call me if you want to grab dinner later in the cafeteria."

Rey made her way down to the emergency department where she met up with her chief, who was in the middle of giving a snapshot to the rest of the team.

"......brought in with C-collar in place, boarded.  Notable left clavicular deformity, found to be tachypnic and hypoxic with decreased breath sounds in the left lung noted by EMS.  Chest Xray showed multiple left sided rib fractures and a pneumothorax, so a chest tube has already been placed.  He's going down for the rest of the imaging series now."

Rey turned to one of the residents. "What else of the history did I miss?"

She watched as the patient was transported quickly to CAT scanning, her heart starting to race as she saw the long body which was too long to fit on the standard stretcher, his visage bruised and bloodied.

The shock of ebony hair which fell over half his face.

Rey felt herself weaken in the knees as her colleague's voice droned on in the background.

"30 year old male, helmeted, motorcycle MVA, loss of consciousness.  Initial GCS 12 on scene, now 14-15.  Struck on the left by a cab and then he got pinned under the bike, second impact to the right.  EMS says the guy was riding some crazy ass racing bike, almost like he threw himself in front of the cab."

Rey's vision swam, she couldn't catch her breath as she felt a scream rise hysterically that died in her throat as his face came into full view.

 

**_Kylo._ **


	12. Dreamscape

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo tries to come to terms with his injuries and reaches a realization regarding his relationship with Rey.  
> *moderately explicit, with some darkness due to dream sequence
> 
> [excerpt]:  
> Sleep however, was still difficult. He and Rey finally found a position that worked relatively well, but he continued to have fitful dreams, sometimes made worse by his medications.

“Rey, are you sure you know what you’re doing?”

Finn and Poe sat her down gently on the couch as she stared at them, a determined look on her face.

Finn spoke next.  “Listen, you know it’s no problem with us if you want to have another person over here in the apartment.  But we’ve seen what this guy has put you through in the last couple of months.  I don’t want you to invest all this time and emotional energy into him, just to have your heart broken again.”

Rey knew they were just looking out for her best interests, but her mind was set.  “I appreciate your concern guys, really I do.  But I owe him one.  Have you forgotten how he helped me after that incident at Tatooine?”

Poe looked at her gently. “You don’t 'owe' him anything, Rey.  It's what any decent human being would have done.”

Rey set her chin.  “Well, you're right.  By the way, he's more than decent.  And I _want_ to.  I know in my heart that he’d do the same for me.”

Poe sighed. “If it’s really what you want, we’re here to support you.  You know that.”

"I love you guys."  Rey gave her friends a hug, relieved they didn't give her a harder time.  She was probably going to run into more difficulty trying to convince Kylo himself. 

 

  **__________________________________**

 

It was nearly a week and a half since Kylo had attempted to deflect the forward direction of the yellow cab in an effort to prevent its driver from running over the boy.  The wayward car struck the left side of the bike and his upper body, causing him to tilt, the weight of the bike toppling over and pinning him against the pavement.  Kylo knew that he was going to go down as a result of his actions, allowing him to prepare for the impact as much as he could given the situation, but there was no way he was going to escape scot free.  He ran down the diagnostic checklist of his injuries with a physician's mentality, trying to assess the physical effects of each one as he did so:

  
1) concussion  
2) facial lacerations  
3) left clavicle fracture  
4) multiple left sided rib fractures  
5) pneumothorax (punctured lung)  
6) liver laceration  
7) intraperitoneal bleeding

 

He winced as he pressed against his stomach, feeling the tension and discomfort of the bruising and blood collection underneath his abdominal wall.  He was lucky that none of his injuries required any surgery.  His left arm was placed in a sling and he was instructed not to move or lift with it.  The team had removed his chest tube once his X-rays showed that his lung had re-expanded and his breathing and oxygenation improved. The dizziness and lightheadedness from his concussion was lessening, and his blood count was stabilizing after receiving several transfusions.  Still, they kept him confined within Republic's walls, "for observation."

He was frustrated with being hospitalized.  It was one thing for him to take care of his patients, it was quite another to actually be one.  He felt cooped up.  He didn't appreciate wearing a flimsy gown with the back flapping open in the breeze, having a nurse wipe and wash his ass as he asked for help getting to the bathroom.  He didn't enjoy being woken up at all hours of the night to have his blood drawn and dealing with the beeping monitors and lights of the ICU. He resented having to listen to the sounds of families visiting their loved ones, while he had to contend with cut flowers and inanimate, cliched get well cards.

By day 10, Kylo had threatened to sign out against medical advice if his physicians didn't discharge him.  Rey thought about him sitting alone in his huge and empty apartment. He couldn’t return to work for well over another month, couldn't manage his basic self care activities, and she knew he would likely be _the most_ non-compliant patient ever.  At times she had to bite her lip to keep from laughing as she found him pouting, frustrated with his immobility and restrictions during his hospital stay.

She finally convinced him to recuperate at her apartment until he was able to manage his needs independently in exchange for persuading the trauma team to release him into her care.  Even though he could have hired someone to take assist him, the desire to be in Rey's company swayed Kylo and he agreed to her terms in the end.

Kylo was now ensconced in her bedroom on his first day of freedom, his large frame taking up her entire bed. He took a look around.  She had decorated the room in tasteful shades of grey with accents of white, making for a soothing retreat.  It was clean and unpretentious.  There were some sentimental things on her shelves: a container filled with exotic, dried flowers; a kachina doll painted bright orange;  a helmet and goggles left over from her go kart racing days.  He was surprised with the lack of familial photographs.  He moved his back slightly and threw some of the bed pillows which were pushing him further down the length of the bed onto the floor in order to give himself more space.  What was it with women and their obsession with throw pillows?

Rey entered, kissing him on his good cheek.  "I'm heading out to the pharmacy now to pick up your medications.  Do you need anything before I go?"  She looked him over.  The lacerations which crossed across his forehead and onto his right cheek were fading, less angry and raised. She wondered if they would disappear completely or leave a permanent scar.  She knew he would still be handsome and breathtaking either way.

"No, I'm good.  I'm going to try to rest a bit."  He looked at Rey, feeling undeserving of her love and attentions.

"Thank you.  For everything."  He stared at her lips, wishing he could taste their softness again.

"You're welcome." Those perfect lips drew into a smile as she closed the door on her way out.

He sighed, trying to find a comfortable way to lie on the small bed after she left.  He placed a pillow underneath his left arm for support and closed his eyes, trying to ignore the discomfort in his ribs and the dressing which tugged on his side as he adjusted his position once more.

Kylo heard a knock on the door.  “Come in.”

Finn pushed the door open.  Kylo looked, remembering the handsome man who sparked his jealousy when he saw him holding Rey's hand outside of Naboo all those weeks ago.

Kylo sat up, albeit painfully, feeling the pull on his ribs and the catch in his breath with the movement.

“Rey’s not here right now, Finn.  She stepped out.”

Finn closed the door behind him, eyes locked on Kylo.  “I know that. It’s not Rey that I want to speak with.  It’s you.”

Kylo raised his eyebrow and waited.

Finn looked at the man.  Even sitting half naked in Rey’s small bed, his arm in a sling supported by fluffy pillows, he cut an imposing figure.

Finn brought his eyes to Kylo’s face and said, “Look. Rey’s one of my best friends in the world.  She’s an amazing person, and there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for her.”

Kylo nodded.

Finn continued. “I don’t know all the details about what happened between the two of you, but I know that I’ve never seen Rey as happy as she's been in the last couple of months.  I've also never seen her as sad."

Finn noted Kylo's look of guilt upon hearing this information.  “You know Rey. When she gets something in her mind, she does it. So she’s got it in her head that she’s going to help you out through your recuperation.  I want you to know that Poe and I are here to give our support, but not for you.  For Rey.”

Kylo nodded slowly. “I understand.”

“I’m also going to tell you that if you fuck around and break her heart again, if you ever hurt her, you’re going to have to deal with me.”  Finn brought himself up. He was compact and muscular, but came up at least half a foot shorter than Kylo.  Kylo had no doubt that Finn meant every word.

Kylo laughed, but it hurt and he ended up wheezing slightly. “Finn, I wouldn’t have it any other way.” His eyes turned serious as he added.  “She deserves better.  It was never my intention to hurt her.”

Finn stood, letting himself out. “Just don’t do it again, and we’re all good.”

 

**__________________________**

 

That night, Kylo had insisted that Rey stay in her room, refusing to inconvenience her further by displacing her to the couch.  Likewise, she adamantly refused to relegate him to the living room on a sofa a foot too short to accommodate the expanse of his body. The two were at an impasse, the result being that they both ended up on her bed, both slightly uncomfortable but not nearly as much as either would have been with the alternative.  Even so, it was difficult finding a workable sleeping position given the amount of room Kylo took up that wouldn't have one of them rolling off the side of the bed or crushing Kylo's left arm and ribs in the process.

They settled for having her lay on his right, her body curled under his arm for positioning to prevent her from getting too close to the edge of the bed. Occasionally she would turn onto her right side, but he found that nearly as uncomfortable, albeit for a different reason as it placed her ass directly against his groin.

Kylo was restless, hypersensitive to the touch of her body.  He also felt unsettled, fatigued from the lack of sleep over the past week and slightly unfocused due to his injuries and the pain medications which he had taken earlier that evening.

He dozed in and out of a fitfully, never knowing if he was actually sleeping. Suddenly, he felt Rey sigh, stretching her body languidly as she murmured his name.  The movement was followed by the sensation of her feminine bottom pushing up against him.

His breath caught and he stiffened in an instant.  He turned, angling his body towards her. Rey leaned back instinctively, feeling the length of him pressed between her buttocks, his balls softly rubbing against the back of her thighs.  She began to swivel her hips slowly, tantalizingly grinding up against his cock.  The crack of her ass enveloped his throbbing shaft and he couldn't restrain himself any longer as he began to thrust up against her, meeting her movements as he sank between the softness of her flesh.

She moaned, a wetness beginning to seep in between her legs which slicked his balls and spread up his shaft as he continued to move between her.  The heat from the friction and sliding of their skin was making him rock hard as he slipped in and out between the cheeks of her ass. 

He no longer cared about his pain or the restrictions placed on his arm as he feverishly removed his sling, using both hands to steady her hips as he pushed up more forcefully against her.  Rey didn't admonish him, she was actually  _encouraging him_ , and he adjusted his position slightly so that the tip of his cock sat angled at the entrance of her soaked pussy.  She reached around,  grabbing his hips to pull him closer, begging him to enter her as she rolled her hips against him, faster and with less control. 

Kylo sank into her with a shudder, reveling in her warmth and wetness, his cock pulsating as it was sheathed within her walls.  He moved slowly at first, pulling back and then sliding forward, his balls slapping against her as she pushed her buttocks against his thighs.  She turned her head towards him, her pupils dilated and her voice filled with lust as his movements increased, becoming more aggressive and frenzied.

_"Oh God, just like that, Kylo!"_ she cried as she egged him on, grinding faster, harder, her eyes fluttering.

It had been weeks since he got off and he couldn't hold back much longer.  He was going to come.  He felt the heat pooling in his groin, his cock impossibly hard as he stared at her gorgeous face, unable to look away from the desire in her gaze, her lips open and panting his name, his nerves on fire with the sensations in his prick, and then there was the pain, the searing, lancing pain which tore into his chest.

  
_FuckfuckfuckFUCK!_

  
Kylo's eyes flew open as he woke up, hard and frustrated, his right hand by his cock, Rey asleep by his side.

It was going to be a long night.

 

**______________________________**

 

Kylo frowned.  It had already been a difficult morning following an even more difficult night, having taken him almost half an hour to put on his jeans one-handed without falling over.  He made a mental note to buy some sweatpants, as zippers and buttons proved to be nearly impossible.  Simple things like putting toothpaste on the toothbrush or trying to open a container of milk for his cereal became monumental accomplishments.  Unfamiliar with having so much empty time on his hands, he decided to pass the time watching television, but there were only so many daytime talk shows, with their inanity and forced laughter, that he could take.

Desperate for company and to thank them for their hospitality, he decided to buy Rey, Finn and Poe dinner that evening when they returned home from work.  Although Kylo had a limited repertoire in the kitchen, his knowledge of and appreciation for fine cuisine was an entirely different matter.

Kylo arranged for a cab, the group making a pit stop to pick up some clothing and essentials from his apartment before stopping at Jakku, one of his favorite Indian restaurants in the city. 

Poe let out a low whistle as they entered a private dining room within the restaurant.  This wasn't the hole-in-the-wall Indian restaurant he was used to frequenting in the Lower East Side.  Chandeliers hung over the two-storied main dining area, glass walls separating the upstairs diners from the down but allowing the patrons an expansive view of the activity below.  The warm tones of the lights softened the sleek and modern décor with its warm woods and creamy whites.

Finn frowned. “I don’t want to sound ungrateful, but don’t think you’re going to buy our support by taking us here.”

Poe shushed him.  "Finn's right, Kylo, but this is incredible.  I'll take any time you're buying."

Kylo looked at them, relaxing slightly within the easy rhythm of the group.  "Believe me, I'm doing this as much for me as anyone else.  I've had to deal with hospital food for nearly two weeks. I've been craving something incredible, as you can well imagine."

They started out with Bhoj Puri Samosas.  Rey had eaten samosa fritters filled with seasoned potatoes and vegetables in the past, but these were filled with pomegranate seeds and had a slight tang which was an exotic complement to the taste and texture of the tubers.  She decided to be a little more adventurous, and her eyes delighted as she tried the Kolambi Pola.  The prawns were sauteed in coconut and lemongrass and sat delicately on top of a cake of chickpeas, almost too pretty to eat.

Finn looked at one of the dishes on the table in front of them.  It looked like lamb in some sort of tomatoey, dark sauce.  It smelled incredible.

"Be careful" Kylo warned "That's Lamb Vindaloo. Very spicy, if you're not used to fiery foods."  Kylo proceeded to spoon a generous portion over his saffron rice, grinning as he chowed down.

Finn snorted. "I can handle it," proceeding to help himself to an amount equal to Kylo's.  He took a tentative bite, tasting the darkness of the lamb along with accents of ginger, vinegar and garlic.  Then the chilis hit.  His eyes began watering as he fanned his mouth, the heat from the dish burning his tongue. It wasn't getting better as he tried to douse it with gulps of water.

Kylo laughed, urging him to eat some rice and ordering him a Lassi. "Here, drink this," he said, pushing forward the sweet, yogurt-based drink. It'll help cut the heat."

Rey and Poe were doubled up in laughter as Finn looked sheepish.

Rey leaned against Kylo, feeding him teasingly as he rested his good hand on her lap.  Finn and Poe were at ease, falling into the comfort of their natural familiarity.  Kylo felt a warmth suffusing his body as he tasted something slightly foreign to him. It was not from the spices or the exotic flavors of the meal. It was just a hint, tickling the back of his mind, of something he hadn't experienced in a very long while.

It was the taste of freedom.

 

**__________________________**

 

Things got a little easier towards end of week. Kylo was finally getting the hang of his morning routine, although it was still a time-consuming effort.

Sleep however, was still difficult. He and Rey finally found a position that worked relatively well, but he continued to have fitful dreams, sometimes made worse by his medications. At times he almost felt as if he were hallucinating as he was starting to fall asleep.

He vowed to stop his pain medications after tonight.  Kylo sat up in bed, propped up on a mountain of pillows, the lights turned down low as he waited for Rey to return from the bathroom.  He fought to keep his eyes open but felt himself nodding off, his lids heavy, the dimness of the light blending with the nighttime sky visible from her small window.

He tried to fight the drowsiness.  Perhaps if he thought about Rey in a--well, _positive_ way--that would keep him up. He began to think of her sexually, fighting the urge to reach down and touch himself as he did so.

Reality and dream blurred. He imagined her on top of him, straddling him on the bed, her naked chest pressed against his. He felt the softness of her breasts and the hardening of her nipples as his tongue snaked out to kiss her.  She sighed as she tasted his warmth, the roughness of his tongue, probing and warring against hers. She wrapped her arms around him, her fingers cascading through the softness of his hair as she pulled, gently tilting his head back so she could nibble kisses along the line of his neck.  She smiled sensually at the moan which left his throat, her eyes fierce and bright, hazel turning liquid gold.

The scene shifted. They were still on her bed, but they were now situated in the middle of the woods. The sky surrounding them was a midnight blue, the trees silhouetted against the sky, blackened and bare branches reaching up into the heavens with their spindly fingers, clawing against the sky.

Kylo knew he was dreaming, but it was a delicious dream.  Rey remained straddling him, shifting her weight ever so slightly. All his senses were heightened, the heat flooding downward into his groin, amplified by the pressure of her hips on his lap and the tingle of her breath on his cheek.

He didn't want to wake up. The knowledge that he was dreaming, a voyeur of everything that his dream self was going through intensified those sensations doubly.

He went back to kissing her, feeling a slight loss as she pulled away and slowly slid down his body.  The loss was quickly replaced with a fierce need as she pressed her breasts against the definition of his stomach, subsequently pillowing his cock between them as she pushed and rubbed the mounds of flesh together.

Things distorted, the background contracting and expanding like a fun house mirror, proportions changing as her breasts seemed to grow in size and his cock grew even longer and thicker, every ounce of feeling concentrated in its inhuman length. She took him in her mouth, licking the pearly drops of fluid that had collected on the tip, her tongue flicking into its slit, humming her pleasure at the taste as he groaned. Her throat seemed to expand as she took him all the way in, impossibly deep, her tongue caressing him, wrapping itself around his shaft in a way that defied reality. He could feel himself tightening, his legs extending and toes curling, the fire escalating within him as she moaned, her throat endless.  He became uncontrolled as he buried himself completely within that mouth, rutting against its moistness and warmth.

She used her hand to rub her cunt as she continued to pleasure him, the wet sounds of her juices sloshing against her fingers inflaming him further.  He leaned forward to take them in his mouth, sucking greedily on each digit. He couldn't get enough, her fingers endlessly leaking her fluids as he drank from them, drunk on her taste. The sensation of the pressure and suckling of his tongue made her gasp as she began to wriggle her hips uncontrollably, her pupils blown in lust.

The air grew cold.  Along with their panting and grunting and moans, Kylo heard something else reach out from behind the darkness.  It came through the veil of the trees, assaulting him from all different directions, whispers and cackling filtering through the breeze.

He thought he could make out some of the voices.  Some were recent, others from his distant past.

Hux?

Snoke?

Grandfather?

Mom?

He looked around as they tried to draw him in, the pitch and cadences of their voices melding in and out of one another in an attempt to draw him in.

He couldn't see anything: only trees, only darkness.

Confused, he turned back, wanting to protect Rey.  She was gone.  He was alone, no one by his feet or at his side.

Kylo felt a coldness and dread come over him as he tried to head in the direction of what he thought were friendlier voices--Anakin, Leia--but he found himself wandering aimlessly in the forest, sometimes ending back in the clearing, other times ending up in a completely different locale.  The maze of trees started to look infuriatingly like one another, and the starless sky gave no reference as to his course until he ended up lost and completely disoriented.

He heard the barking of hounds in background, aggressive and bloodthirsty with their teeth bared and he felt a sliver of fear. A tinkling of laughter, a melody and the sounds of bubbling water gave him hope and he headed towards its siren song, away from the barking and growling.

He saw her again by a fountain, a narwhal tusk in her hand. Rey was now dressed in a gown, diaphenous and flowing. She looked like an angel, the whale's tusk glittering in her grasp, the light of a million stars captured in its helical form, beckoning to him.

She held up the horn to him. He grabbed it, it's shape fitting perfectly in his large hands.  As they wielded it together, the tusk pulsated and glowed.  A calm settled over him, the sounds of the dogs fading away in the distance, the whispers surrounding him quieting.  A feeling of serenity overtook him as him as he hung his head, exhausted from his running, seeking to escape his weariness as he lay against her.

Rey moved her fingers through his wavy locks, brushing them back, soothing him with her touch.  She continued to caress him, calming him with her touch.  He closed his eyes as her lips lowered to his forehead in a kiss.

Her hands stilled suddenly as her eyes flew open.  She raised her head, staring off into the distance.

He hears it too: a hissing in the blackness, a slithering darkness, unctuous, crawling, engulfing all the light in its path.  It caused his hair to stand on end. The hissing gets progressively louder and more ubiquitous, but he still can’t localize it. It's suffocating him, the air becoming thick as the fear returns.

His eyes dart around. He feels something cold against his leg, slimy. Too late, he realizes, as he feels its tendrils wrap around his legs, rooting him in place.

It slithers around Rey as well, moving itself up her body slowly, each coiled turn dimming her luminosity.  She is immobile as she watches Kylo, although her eyes remain bright. She makes no attempt to escape as the creature continues to wrap itself around her, enclosing her legs, strapping her arms to her sides and constricting her lungs until only her head and neck remain, the rest of her covered in its slimy darkness.

The darkness continues to coil around her, wrapping itself around her throat until it faces Kylo with it's snaked head, it's forked tongue flickering in and out.  With an evil grin, it approached Rey's mouth as if to envelop her in its demonic kiss, threatening to fill her orifices as Kylo strained against his immobile body, impotent against the creature's restraints. It's fangs are bared in a heinous smile as it methodically winds itself around her face until she is completely encased in its blackness, bright no more.

The creature is now directly in front of Kylo, and he's staring back at its face.  He knows that face: it's Snoke's, with his calculating eyes, his evil mouth, his malicious mind, and his vindictiveness all on display as he lunges towards Kylo, poison dripping from its fangs as he strikes, never once releasing him from his terrible gaze.

Kylo woke up, a keening, almost inhuman cry escaping from his throat.

 

Everything came rushing back.  Over twenty years of repressed feelings of loss and fear, desire and disappointment, loneliness and want.  Kylo was overwhelmed, spinning with the emotions which threatened to overtake him.  He thought about his grandfather, remembering the comfort of his hand as they walked together, the smell of cigars on his clothing, the deep bass of his voice as he spoke to him as a person and not a little child.  He thought about his mother and his father, who always tried to do the right thing and love him unconditionally despite the tantrums and whims of an unappreciative and moody teenager.  He thought about Snoke, who professed to be his friend and mentor, but treated him as a possession and a means to an end without any concern for his personal happiness.

He thought about Rey, and how she was his equal in many ways: her intelligence, her capability, her drive.  He also knew the ways in which she bested him: her joy, her spirit, her love of life, her deep friendships and loyalty.  In many ways, she resembled the people who loved him most: his grandfather and his parents.  Regardless of whether it was 'Ben' or 'Kylo,' they loved him for himself, without concern for his money or titles or accolades.

With Rey, he felt complete. Without her.....

His stomach clenched at the thought. 

Rey ran in when she heard his cries. She paled upon seeing the rapid rate of his breathing, his eyes wild, his body soaked with sweat.  She felt his forehead, thinking he may be feverish, and breathed a sigh of relief when she found him cool. She placed a kiss on his forehead, sitting her body next to his, bringing her arm around to hold him close. 

He turned towards her, seeing but not seeing.  He reached out, needing tangible confirmation of her existence as he held onto to her tightly, his voice wracked with emotion.

"I thought I lost you." He nearly sobbed.

"I'm here," she whispered.   _I've always been here._

The thought of being without her, of never having her by his side overwhelmed him.  This was not the fear which he was used to living with, the fear which prevented him from moving forward, incapacitating him.  This was a fear of losing his other half, the part that made him feel whole.  It was a fear that finally drove him to action.

He brought his right hand behind her head, drawing her closer. His kiss was filled with emotion, the sentiment pouring out of him onto her lips, of his want, his need, his love for her. He tasted the sweetness of her mouth, filled with the peppermint scent of her toothpaste, mixing against a slight saltiness which may have been his own tears.  His hand traced the details of her face like a blind man,  memorizing the curve of her cheekbones, the hollows of her cheek, the bridge and slope of her nose, the delicate lashes which framed her hazel eyes.

She returned his kiss, ridding herself of any remaining reservations as she gave herself up completely to him.  He was hers, she was his.  They belonged together. She knew it as much as he did.

Kylo held her hand, feeling its warmth and weight against his as he brought it to his lips. He looked up, his expressive brown eyes the color of amber, his soul bared.

He needed to get the words out, to let her know.  "Rey.  I don't know what I've done in my life to deserve you.  But I know that I can't imagine my life without you in it.  You are my light, you allow me to be me.

"You complete me."

Her breath caught. She had been waiting to hear those words for so long, words that echoed the feelings in her heart.

He leaned in, nuzzling the nape of her neck, his words softened but full of conviction.

"I think I've always known. I can't run away from my feelings any longer.

_"I love you."_

Rey's heart felt so full as she placed her palm against his chest, her fingers curling against his bared skin, feeling the beating of his heart underneath, letting her love radiate through the gentleness of that touch.

She had to bring it up.  The person who stood in the way of their happiness, of Kylo's future.

She gave him a kiss, lifting her eyes to his as she murmured against his lips. "Kylo, what about Snoke?"

He returned her gaze, determined and resolute. "We'll find a way. Together, we are stronger than he is."

He brought his lips back to hers, sealing his words with that promise.


	13. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The end is sometimes just the beginning. The conclusion to Amygdala. Lots and lots of fluffiness :)
> 
> [excerpt]:  
> He had thought about this day, his heart bursting with eagerness as they drove through the valley and headed towards the coast. There was one small mountain range left on their route before the rivers started draining into the ocean basin, and Poe had informed him of a magical spot that Kylo wanted to share with Rey.

The sound of the Suzuki V-Strom's twin engines became higher pitched as the driver revved it into the upper digits, the suspension system giving mild protest to the weight of the two passengers as they bounced along the dirt road.  Rey wrapped her gauzy skirt underneath her tanned legs as she hugged Kylo through the twists and turns of the mountainous countryside.

It wasn't yet noon, but they had already been up for over seven hours.  Earlier that morning, they had summited Volcan Mustafar, a dormant volcano engulfed in the clouds.  After ascending over several thousand feet, they reached the top, high above the tree line with a vast view over the mountainous island and the deep blue of the Pacific Ocean in the distance.

Rey laughed as she snapped a selfie of them at the peak, the wind whipping through their hair and the brightness of the morning sun forcing at least one of them to squint in most of the pictures.  Kylo's hair was almost as unruly as hers, even as he attempted to tie it back.  But she was finally successful, a perfect shot of the two of them together, with the clouds and the craggy, striated peaks below and the wide expanse of the island surrounding them.

She had posted it on Instagram as soon as they descended back into civilization, and delighted as she received the first "like" from Finn and Poe.

She smiled as she read Finn's comment.

She looked up at Kylo as he bent over her shoulder to see what was pleasing her so.  "We have to see Finn and Poe as soon as we get back to New York," she told him.

He nodded in agreement, kissing her on the top of her head as he hugged her from behind.  "I can't wait to meet Kira."

Finn and Poe had originally planned to accompany Rey and Kylo on their trip but canceled after receiving word that their adoption was about to go through.  The couple's time was now dedicated to domestic bliss and to being doting parents to their baby girl.

Kylo and Rey shed their layers of clothing as the weather warmed at the lower altitude.  Rey's stomach growled.  She leaned over to Kylo, trying to yell above the noise of the motorcycle's engine.

"Can we stop somewhere to get something to eat?!"

Kylo smiled beneath his helmet.  Some things never changed.

They  pulled up to a roadside stand for a quick bite, knowing they still had a long journey ahead.  The restaurant looked to be less than one hundred squared feet in total and was decorated in bright red and blue colors.  Spartan chairs and a chalkboard sign in sat in front, their colored letters spelling out the menu for the day.  They were in the valley now, vegetation and farmland surrounding them, framed by the green mountains in the distance.  Chickens dotted the roadside, scavenging for kitchen scraps as well as for insects and seed, oblivious to their destiny.

Rey ordered a coconut water, delighting as the proprietor hacked off the top of the pipa and stuck a straw in its soft flesh.  The drink was slightly sweet and cool, refreshing her parched throat. Kylo opted for a frosty mug of Imperial beer, and they dove into a platter of rice and beans and pork rinds flavored with yucca and lime.  Rey's hunger had abated somewhat as their main dishes arrived, tamales colorados and a chicken and onion stew.  She sighed as the tender pieces of chicken fell apart in her mouth, mixing with the tangy, thick green sauce of onions and tomatillos.

Rey startled as her phone chirped.  Kylo's phone, as usual, was powered off as he refused to be disturbed during this portion of their trip.

 She took a look at the text, from Poe. 

"Kylo," she said, her voice hesitant.  "Snoke's dead."

Kylo looked past Rey, his breathing stilled for a second upon hearing the news.  It was several years since he had any contact with the man. 

 

  **_____________________________**

 

Kylo stood in front of Snoke's door, collecting his thoughts before entering.  He had asked for this appointment with Snoke.

He had been waiting for this moment for months.

Kylo had returned to Arkanis full time that January following his accident.  The two months prior had been busy ones, not only with regards to his recuperation.  Given television's desire for feel-good moments during the Thanksgiving season, he found his name suddenly splashed through the local papers and morning news shows.  The mother of the boy whose life he had saved was more than eager to share her side of the story, singing Kylo's praises as she made her rounds.

Snoke, of course, had also seen an opportunity to use the public's current interest in Kylo to showcase the quality and character of a model Arkanis physician.  Kylo had allowed Snoke to prostitute his name and likeness in order to heighten the hospital's profile, but he also began to introduce Rey and the team at Republic into the conversations, crediting them with his recovery.  The press and public were fascinated by Rey, the beautiful physician who seemed to have captured his heart, and it wasn't soon after that she and Kylo became the new "it" couple.  Finn had teased them mercilessly as they began appearing on the gossip rags, the striking couple's pictures plastered next to headlines such as "Rey: Pregnant with Kylo's baby!!!" or "Kylo: Saved by Love!"

Now he stood outside the heavy wood door, the man who had previously controlled his future on the other side.  Kylo raised his hand and knocked.

Snoke opened the door, waving him in.  "Come in, my boy," he smiled.  It was almost genuine.  It was probably the closest that Snoke felt to caring about anyone besides himself.

Snoke gave Kylo a pat on the shoulder, walking around his desk to take a seat in front of him.  Kylo's positive media exposure had been good business for Arkanis, indeed.

Snoke leaned forward, speaking first.  "How is everything going with the DOH?"

"Very well, sir," Kylo replied.  Kylo had been working to establish traffic safety and head injury prevention programs for New York City schools following his accident, efforts which did not go by unnoticed by the mayor's office and the Department of Health.  "In fact, they have now asked me to assist them in looking into quality of care and other community-based initiatives."

"Good, good," nodded Snoke.  Kylo's sudden altruistic streak could continue to keep them politically tied in a most positive way.

"You know, Dr. Ren, I've been thinking.  Hux really has his hands full with the concussion project.  Perhaps the scale is too large, requiring co-lead investigators.  If you have the time and interest given all your other projects, that is."

Kylo took a deep breath.  He steeled himself for what he was about to say

"Dr. Snoke. I appreciate the offer.  However, the reason I wanted to speak with you today is that I've been offered a position, at Republic and within the board of the Department of Health.  After giving it much thought, it is a position that I have accepted.

"I am here to offer my resignation from Arkanis."

Snoke looked apoplectic. His anger was fueled by the fact that he was completely caught off guard by the announcement.

"Republic?  That pitiful, run down institution?" he hissed.  "That hospital is a joke, Kylo! It's constantly fighting to stay afloat. It's nothing but a training ground for residents in an antiquated facility, with no research to speak of and a burnt out faculty, deficient in all ways possible!"

He looked disgusted.  "It caters to population filled with uneducated, non-compliant and uninsured patients."

Kylo looked back, undeterred. "Yes, it _is_ all those things. For now. But that's why they have asked me to join. To help them develop the programs to make them one of the best public hospitals in the country."

Snoke stood, trembling in his rage.  "This is foolhardy and rash, Kylo Ren, even for you.  You will be throwing away your entire career, everything that you have worked for!"

Kylo answered, with a calmness and certitude he didn't realize he had.  "I have spent many years of my life trying to be the best, to be the most successful.  I don't need Arkanis to continue to do groundbreaking research.  I have enough money of my own to be comfortable regardless of where I practice.  I am at the stage of my life where I want to provide quality care to those who really need it, and to help others access that level of care too."

Snoke realized he couldn't sway Kylo with his arguments and resorted to threats, barely able to get out his words, spittle coming out of his mouth with each bitter sound.

"I--will--destroy you!  Have you forgotten about your past behaviors?  Your aggressive outbursts?  Your assault on Hux?  Your inappropriate behavior with Dr. Kenobi as her supervisor?"

Kylo nearly laughed at Snoke's pathetic attempt to blackmail him. "If I remember, Dr. Snoke, you had appeared on a number of news shows with me, and with Rey by my side, waxing poetic about my character.  For you to attack my relationship with her, or to bring up a gentleman's disagreement with Hux half a year after the fact would look petty and unprofessional, especially given the timing of my new appointment with the DOH."

Kylo allowed himself a feeling of self-satisfaction as he watched the anger play across Snoke's face.  The thing that Snoke was so very good at, which had served him his purposes in the past--creating media connections and spreading his agenda through the outlets at his disposal--now tied his hands.

Snoke was furious as he felt history repeating itself.  Just as he had lost Anakin thirty years ago, he was about to lose his hold on his grandson as well.  A sadness and a strange feeling of loss mixed with his wrath.

"You ungrateful...after all of the things I've done for you?  The years I have spent supporting you, when you were nothing but a lonely and friendless boy?   Have all your years at Arkanis, all my efforts, meant nothing to you?"

He sneered, his eyes narrowed in hate.  "You have no loyalty.  You are nothing, just like the rest of your family!!" He was practically screaming the words.

Kylo watched him, stone faced.  "I am giving you my two month's notice, because I  _do_ care about Arkanis and many of the people here. And I am giving you my two month's notice  _despite_  all the horrible things that I've allowed you to do to me in the past."

Kylo stood, looking back once more at the loathesome man before leaving.

"And your comment about my family?  I'll take that as a compliment."

Maz watched Kylo as he exited Snoke's office.  If she heard the screaming in the minutes before, she made no mention of it. 

There was a great fondness in her voice as she spoke her next words. "I wish you well, Kylo.  I've known you for so many years.  I am happy that you are moving on."

She smiled at him wisely.  "You and Rey, hmm? I've always known that she was a very wonderful, special girl."

Kylo smiled back.  He was going to miss Maz terribly.  "That, she is, Maz.  It just took me a little longer to realize it than you."

 

**__________________________**

 

 Kylo tried to search his feelings upon hearing of Snoke's passing, looking for anger, sadness, pleasure, or a lack of forgiveness upon hearing the news.  The man had been a large part of his life for over fifteen years, and for all his manipulative and vindictive ways, made Kylo the person he was today.  As large of a role as Snoke had played in Kylo's earlier life, he had later become irrelevant.   Kylo found that he didn't experience any of those expected emotions upon hearing of Snoke's passing.  He had moved beyond those things.  He accepted it as the way things were.

As it was, he and Rey were on a timetable, heading to a small rural airport to take them on the last leg of their journey.  Kylo had volunteered to perform a tumor resection on a pediatric patient who lived in a remote village on a neighboring island.

Kylo gently squeezed Rey's hand, letting her know that they needed to leave.  He paid for lunch, leaving a generous tip and they hopped back on the bike.  He had one more stop to make before they reached the airport.

He had thought about this day, his heart bursting with eagerness as they drove through the valley and headed towards the coast.  There was one small mountain range left on their route before the rivers started draining into the ocean basin, and Poe had informed him of a magical spot that Kylo wanted to share with Rey.

He parked the bike as they entered through a lush canopy of trees.  She was overwhelmed by the melodic sounds of birds, their songs punctuated occasionally by the screeching of howler monkeys.  Kylo held Rey's hand as they traversed a small manmade trail which led to a beautiful waterfall, its cool waters cascading down a wall of sheer granite.  Despite the beauty, he knew they only had a mere fifteen minutes to spend in this paradise before they had to get back on the road again.

They sat by the edge of the slippery rocks, the rushing water from the falls disturbing the calmness of the pool of water underneath.  Rey tentatively dipped her feet in. It was cold, but not overly so, the currents and eddies massaging the sore muscles in her legs.  She closed her eyes, allowing herself to rest just a bit, when she heard Kylo move next to her, pulling out something from his backpack.

She opened her eyes.  His face was close to hers, smiling, his eyes a warm amber in the light.

Kylo brought his hand up to her face.  It was the same move he made during her first night on call at Arkanis five years ago, the night they shared his dinner. He rubbed his thumb gently over her cheeks, feeling the softness of her skin under the roughness of his hand as she leaned into his touch.

The sun was dappled, filtered through the leaves of the forest.  Its rays highlighted the gold  tones in her sun-kissed hair, the blush in her cheeks, the pink of her lips.  Even with her hair escaping from the confines of her hastily tied bun, slightly dampened from the humidity, he had never seen her look more beautiful.

He lowered himself to the ground, prostrating himself in front of her, her breath catching as he held out a small box.

She felt herself shaking as his steady hands opened the lid. A beautiful ring sat in the center, a single emerald cut canary diamond surrounded by a setting of white diamonds, the color of the sun and the stars.

Kylo's eyes never wavered from her face.

"Rey.  Five years ago, I thought that being a successful surgeon and the future head of Arkanis would have been everything I needed to feel fulfilled.  Then I met you, and my life was turned upside down.

"It was five years ago that you showed me that there was so much more to life.  You showed me that fear is not a way of living.  You taught me how to love, not only myself, but how to give that love to another.

"You give me joy.  You make me a better person.  And as amazing as the last five years have been, I can't wait to see what the next fifty will bring.   And there is no one that I'd rather spend those years with than you."

He took a deep breath, his heart full, fighting the emotions which caused his voice to waver slightly.

"Rey, you are my everything.  Will you marry me?"

"Yes."  Rey lowered herself down, throwing her arms around him, punctuating her response with kisses. "Yes, yes, yes!"

He pulled away slightly in order to bring her left arm in front of her, slipping the ring on her finger.  It fit perfectly, the beams of light glinting off the diamonds matching the one within her.

"It's beautiful, Kylo," she breathed.

He kissed her hungrily, his lips pressing on hers, insistent.  She tilted her head slightly and parted her lips as his tongue pressed forward.  She sighed as he tasted her, deepening their kiss, his hand reaching behind the nape of her neck to pull her closer to him.  She responded by loosening his hair from the strap tying it back, letting his waves fall over his face.

A feeling of possessiveness mixed with happiness at the knowledge that she had accepted his proposal.  _Mine_ , he thought, _forever and ever_.  _Us._   Desire flared in him, and he slipped his hand under the strap of her sundress, lowering it slowly and exposing her tanned breast.  He rubbed her nipple between his forefingers, feeling it pebble and peak as she gasped into his mouth, and he brought his lips down and suckled it, surrounding it with his warmth, the humidity of the air mixing with the cold spray misting from the waterfall and the wetness of his mouth.  He wished for more time, as he would have made love to her right then and there. Instead, he made it a promise of things to come.

He pulled away reluctantly and held her to him as they gazed at the tableau in front of them, a mini Eden.  Neither wanted to break the spell, so they waited a brief minute, reveling in their happiness and fighting the hands of time before standing and walking back to the roadway.

They drove along the coast, the bike now humming as the road became smoother. They felt and tasted the saltwater breeze of the ocean as the forest faded into the background, the sky changing from a bright blue to a pinkish orange with the setting sun.  They soon came to a clearing, a small rural airport with a short and narrowed landing strip visible in the distance.

As the approached, the saw the Cessna Citation X jet sitting on the runway, _"Médecins Sans Frontières"_ painted in red on its side. There were two figures waiting for them on the tarmac. The woman was older but still beautiful, her hair pulled into a chignon, her face full of hope and a mother's pride. The male had a well-worn leather jacket, still dashing with rakish good looks despite the graying of his hair, a roguish grin on his face.  The woman's eyes lifted, her lips trembling slightly as she saw the couple pull up, her hand lifted to her heart while holding tight to her husband's hand.

Kylo and Rey dismounted from the bike.  Rey gave him an encouraging smile as they clasped hands, walking together towards the plane, towards his parents. 

 _Kylo,_ she thought.  It didn't matter the name.  He had finally reconciled his past, Ben and Kylo finally becoming one.

Kylo was finally at peace. With Rey at his side, he was finally whole.

He was finally home.

**Author's Note:**

> *Come say "hi" on [Tumblr!](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/nerdherderette)


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